


Never Enough

by Jesse_Rae



Category: Yuri!!! on Ice (Anime)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Alternate Universe - Soulmates, Angst, Angst with a Happy Ending, Asexual Character, Fluff, Fluff and Angst, Homophobia, LGBTQ Character, LGBTQ Themes, M/M, Pansexual Character, Slow Burn, Soulmate-Identifying Timers, Soulmates
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2016-11-27
Updated: 2017-03-18
Packaged: 2018-09-02 14:48:12
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 7
Words: 28,958
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8671606
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Jesse_Rae/pseuds/Jesse_Rae
Summary: Victor had counted down the days until he would meet his soulmate. Yuuri didn't believe in soulmates. However, as fate would have it, they were soulmates.Soulmate AU. Time identifying soulmate clocks.





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> Hi all!  
> This is my first fanfic so I hope you all enjoy!  
> I really love the idea of soulmate clocks that countdown to the time when you meet your soulmate. So here's my take on it!
> 
> Please follow me on my tumblr @jesse-rae-on-ice for more updates under #neverenoughfic!!

Victor would never forget the day his soulmate clock turned on.

It was a cold day in late November. The trees had scattered all of their leaves on the ground, leaving a thick layer of red and brown leaves. It hadn't started to snow quite yet, despite the fact that it was almost December, but it surely would soon. 

He had just gotten back from at day at nursery school. His class had learned all of the months of the year, paying special attention to December. He loved going to nursery school, but really, he just wanted to play at the ice rink. 

He peeled off his blue puffy winter coat, desperate to get the over-sized coat off of his body. His mother always insisted on dressing up for the weather, even if he claimed it wasn’t cold. Victor liked the cold, embraced it even. He just wished he didn’t have to wear such overwhelming attire.

Victor changed out his sweater, relieved that he was finally rid of all of the layers of clothes. He pulled out his bottom drawer of his dresser - looking for a cotton t-shirt with a truck on it - when he got a glimpse of his wrist. A faint red glow was emitting from his wrist watch. 

"Mama!" Victor shouted from his room. Forgoing a t-shirt, Victor sprinted out of his room, desperate to reach his mother. He rushed down the long staircase, his feet stumbling to keep up with the rest of his body. He turned the corner and ran into the kitchen. 

His mother turned around from stirring sauce in a pot. "What is it, sweetheart?" she asked, the stirring spoon at her hip. “And why don’t you have a shirt on? You’re going to get sick!”

"My watch! Look! Look!" he exclaimed, flaunting his wrist for his mother to see.

Victor's mother bent down to get a better look at his wrist. Sure enough, the watch had turned on, its screen displaying the red numbers proudly. 

"It sure is! I'm so proud!" Victor's mother gushed. 

She wrapped her arms around her son, embracing him in a hug. Victor tried to squirm out of her grasp but that only made her squeeze him tighter.

"I didn't think it would turn on!” she admitted. Now that he was almost four, Victor’s mother was all about ready to give up on his watch turning on. Sure, many people had age differences between their soulmates, but four years was becoming excessive. She didn’t want to inspire false hope in him, if it never did turn on. “Some people never have theirs turn on. It's so sad, really. Nikola’s parents said you'd end up like that, but I knew yours would turn on! We should go show your father!"

Victor stared at the watch, unable to read the numbers. He had seen many other watches before - his family’s and his friend’s and even the characters on his television shows - but it looked almost foreign to him seeing his own numbers light up.

He tilted his head to the side, staring wide eyed at his wrist. "What does it mean?"

"This says when you'll meet your soulmate,” his mother explained in a matter-of-fact tone.

"What's a soulmate?"

He heard the word multiple times at nursery school; it was all some children would talk about. They would stare at their wrist throughout the whole class, ignoring the lessons the teachers gave. Some would brag about how they were the closest to meeting their soulmate. 

During playtime, they would act out scenes with out playmates about meeting their soulmates. The kids would pair up and pretend that today was the day their watches would go off. Some began to plan their marriages with dress-up wedding clothes and plastic cakes stacked on top of blocks. Other students made families together and pretended the little crying baby doll was their child. Victor supposed he never understood, seeing as his watch had yet to show the numbers. He just ignored those students and, instead, played freeze dance with a few other students whose watches had yet to turn on.

"A soulmate is the person you will spend the rest of your life with. Legend has it that the Gods created people four eyes and four arms. However, the Gods became wary that we were too powerful and we could easily take them down. So the Gods split us from our soulmate as punishment. Now we must walk the earth trying to find our other half," she explained the old legend.

She wasn’t sure how much she believed it; it was a silly story for children anyways, but that didn’t stop her from believing in soulmates at all. She thought of the day her soulmate clock had counted down, a dreamy expression on her face. She had agonizingly waited thirty one years with baited breath until she would meet him. Her soulmate was a new lawyer and she would be his assistant. One look at each other and both of their watches beeped. And, she supposed, the rest was history. 

"So what does it say?" Victor asked, pointing his watch towards his mother.

She squinted at the numbers, hoping that Victor would not have to wait as long as she did. "It says 23 years 7 days 3 hours 5 minutes 41 seconds "

Victor pouted, looking at the numbers again. "23 years? That's so far away!" Victor thought of the three (almost four) years he had been alive. Now he would have to wait even longer. He couldn’t even imagine one year left alone twenty three. It simply wasn’t fair.

"It’s really not that far,” his mother said, offering him some comfort in her words. “I had to wait more than thirty years.”

"I don’t care! I can't wait that long! I want to meet her now!" Victor demanded, stomping his feet stubbornly. He always got what he wanted, growing up in a rich family allowed him to. Now, he was denied the one thing he wanted more than anything else and he couldn’t stand it. 

"Well you don't want to meet her now; you're far too young." Victor’s mother ruffled his platinum blond hair affectionately. She noted how long his hair was getting, conscious of how feminine shoulder length hair looked on her son. Now that it was confirmed that he had a soulmate, she would probably cut it to a reasonable length. 

He pouted, stubbornly crossing his arms over his chest. He didn't want to wait so long to meet his soulmate. Twenty three years was a long time to wait. If they were truly destined to be together, he wouldn't have to wait such a long time. He should be with his soulmate now.

Victor pouted, pursing out his bottom lip.

"But I don't want to wait!" 

Victor's mother smiled fondly, her face crinkling around her eyes as she did. She remembered being just like Victor, so eager to meet her soulmate. She had counted down the days with her friends and almost skipped work to try her luck meeting her soulmate somewhere else. She knew exactly how Victor was feeling, but she supposed he would grow out of it with time.  

"I know it seems hard right now, but sometimes, you have to wait."

"I don't want to wait twenty three years! That's older than you!"

She chuckled at that comment. "I’m flattered, Vitya. but you should count your blessings. Some people have to wait until they're fifty! You should be lucky it's only twenty three years. That’s pretty soon.”

"Soon," he whispered, starting at the red digital numbers, slowly counting down.

* * *

 

December 6th, 2013.

That was the date Victor had calculated to be the day he would meet his soulmate. He had it marked on his calendar for years. He had done ever calculation, accounted for every leap year, every time zone, every possible detail.

He knew he would meet his soulmate tonight.

He assumed it was fate. He would win both another Grand Prix title and his soulmate’s heart all on the same night. His soulmate would witness history in the making and Victor would finally be complete. 

He looked down at the watch, desperate to make time move faster. The red digits now counting down mere minutes until he would lock eyes with his soulmate. 

His mind began to imagine what it would be like to finally meet his soulmate. After figuring out what a soulmate was, he had joined in with his other classmates and created as many scenarios as his little mind could conjure. Everything from spilling coffee on his soulmate’s shirt at a coffee shop to climbing the tallest tower after defeating a dragon and rescuing his soulmate were possibilities to young Victor. Sure, he was an adult now at the age of twenty six (twenty seven in a few weeks), but that didn’t stop him from immaturely picturing every possible scenario. 

In the end, he had decided he would meet his soulmate on the ice. Naturally, he would be with his soulmate doing the one thing he truly loved. He would seduce his soulmate with his routine and he would lock eyes with his soulmate who cheered the loudest in the audience. It was the most likely of scenarios. 

Victor wondered what his soulmate looked like. He wondered if his soulmate had light eyes or dark hair. He wondered if his soulmate was male or female or any gender in between. He knew he wasn’t entirely picky and didn’t exactly have a “type”, but he wondered all of the same. 

Victor would often doze off, thinking about what his soulmate was like. He dreamed that his soulmate would be gentle, but also assertive, especially in bed. He imagined his soulmate would be one to laugh at his jokes, no matter how terrible and to cry on his shoulder while watching a sad movie and to hold his hand as they skated on the ice.

He wondered what his soulmate thought of him. He wondered if his soulmate was thinking about him right now. 

"Stop focusing on that dumb watch and focus on your skating. Worry about your soulmate after you've won," Victor's coach lectured, watching Victor as he nervously bit his finger nails. 

"Ah," Victor hummed looking up from his watch, his thoughts interrupted. He knew Yakov wasn’t fond of his infatuation - more like obsession - of his soulmate watch. Yakov was more concerned with the longevity of Victor’s skating career than his love life. "It's easy for you to say. You already met yours."

"And she's a cheating whore," he sneered, bitterly. 

Yakov didn’t have that much luck with his soulmate. His watch had gone off at the age of sixteen. In all of the excitement, Lilia’s parents had arranged for her to get married to him to gain some extra money. In the end, they had rushed into their relationship too quickly and realized they needed some time apart. There were sometimes, it just wasn’t meant to be. Complications did arise, as rare as they were. 

"Just goes to show those things are stupid."

"Whatever you say," he noted, rolling his blue eyes. He wouldn't be affected by Yakov's discouraging words. Not tonight, of all nights. He had waited for this night for twenty three years, practically twenty seven if he counted the years before his watch turned on. 

He had to make meeting his soulmate perfect. 

"Just make sure you're perfect tonight," Yakov demanded. He knew Victor was capable of winning gold, especially with his record breaking short performance the night before. But he knew that was only one third of the results and the free performance could easily ruin his rather large lead. 

Yakov wanted Victor to win again. Victor was a legend and deserved to be appreciated for all of his efforts. He had never trained a skater who was half as good as Victor. But, in all honesty, he wasn’t sure how much longer Victor had. He wasn’t sure that this was even his last year or not.

Victor shifted his weight to his right leg, a bit tired with Yakov’s demands. Skating to Victor wasn’t always about winning as much as it was about putting his own emotions out for everyone to see. He hoped he could convey his emotions to his soulmate tonight. "Is that all you care about?"

"That's all _you_ should care about," Yakov argued defensively.  

Victor slung his arm around Yakov's shoulder affectionately. "How could I possibly focus when I'm supposed to meet my soulmate tonight?"

Yakov brushed his arm off of his shoulder. He was never the type to give hugs or be affectionate at all. He liked to remain stoic and not show his vulnerable side. Victor, on the other hand, was always touchy-feely and expressed his emotions freely. He would surely get into trouble for that.

"I know. You've been telling everyone for the past ten years, even though I told you not to.”

Victor chuckled at that comment. “How could I not?” For the past few years, Victor had effortlessly flaunted his soulmate clock in hopes his soulmate would see his interviews and the time would somehow change. Victor knew it was a long-shot, but it was worth a chance. Any chance to meet his soulmate early was a risk he was willing to take.

However, Yakov was right to lecture him for that. Flaunting his soulmate clock didn’t come without consequences. Multiple times, rabid fans would come up to him, claiming to be his soulmate and that his clock was just broken. It was amusing at first, but now he was tired of their desperation. Each time it had happened, he had entertained them just slightly. He would chuckle at their enthusiasm, give them a peck on the cheek, and told them to wait for their own soulmate. 

"I wonder what my soulmate is like. Are they a fan?" he began, babbling on about his soulmate. He knew it was ridiculous and cliche, but he couldn’t stop. This was the person he would spend his entire life with. Yakov should understand that this was a bigger deal than any competition, even if it was a Grand Prix Final. He could always win another gold, but he only had one soulmate.

"Do you think they know who I am? Do you think they know how to skate-"

"You should be wondering if you are going to land your jumps," Yakov lectured. "Don't let this mess up your skating. You don't have much more time in the spotlight. You’re getting older. Pretty soon, someone younger will be Russia's next top skater. Yuri's looking pretty promising."

Victor leaned against the banister of the ice rink, watching the machine smooth all of the imperfection in the ice. He exhaled, his breath creating a small cloud in the crisp air. "Who said I'd be returning next year anyways?"  

He wasn’t sure he wanted to remain in the ice skating world anymore. Things were becoming ever more complicated, and he was simply running out of surprises. He supposed Yakov was right, there would always be someone younger and better than Victor. Maybe he should quit while he was ahead.

"You're going to quit now?" he sneered. Yakov never thought he would the day that Victor would even consider quitting. Victor was selfish, especially when it came to his fame; always trying to be the center of attention. It was amusing to see Victor would even entertain the idea of someone coming between him and his skating. "I thought you loved the spotlight."

He shrugged his shoulders, indifferently. It wasn’t that he hated the fame - actually, it was quite the opposite - that came with ice skating, but was rather sick of it. Winning didn’t have the same appeal it used to when he was forced to gallivant at extravagant parties and constantly surprise his audience. He just wanted to ice skate, like he did as a child. If he never had to do another press conference or fake another smile or say some pre-written message ever again, he wouldn’t be mad. 

Maybe, he always wanted to live a normal life. Everyone else had a normal childhood and yet Victor was taken out of school early to focus all of his efforts on ice skating. At the time, ice skating was his passion; and maybe it still is. But now, he wasn’t entirely sure. Skating for fame didn’t have the same appeal as skating for the raw enjoyment he once got.

"Who knows what I'll do. Maybe I want to start a domestic life with my soulmate,” he tempted suggestively.

He supposed he was just saying that to rile up his coach. But something inside of him truly believed he could start a domestic life. He could move to the suburbs, own a few dogs, and live out the rest of his days in peace, like everyone else. He only had so many surprises left. Maybe retiring would be his last.

Yakov snorted, a bit amused with Victor's fantasy of settling down. Yakov knew Victor could easily squeeze in three more successful years of his career, four if there were no injuries. He had raw talent and the perseverance to continue. He was Russia’s top skater, after all.  

Besides, ice skaters didn't simply 'settle down' after they retire, especially not someone who was at the top of his game like Victor. He would likely receive sponsorship deals or a successful modelling career. If all else fails, he could join Yakov and coach some of the younger prodigies.  

Ice skating wasn’t a sport someone like Victor Nikiforov simply 'retired' from.  

And yet, he claimed he would give it all away for some person he hadn't even met. It all seemed so far fetched to Yakov. Especially for someone as self-centered as Victor.

"Doesn't sound like you. You're not one to settle down."

"But this is my soulmate we're talking about!" he explained, his blue eyes twinkling. He had dreamed of what his life would be with his soulmate. That they would wake up together, cuddling with their multitude of dogs. His soulmate would make him breakfast as he got ready for work, giving his soulmate a kiss on the cheek before leaving. During the day, he would receive texts from his soulmate, cute little messages reminding him that he was loved. At night, he would come home to a warm bed and would repeat the routine every day of his life. 

"I'd do anything for my soulmate,” he defended.

Yakov adverted his eyes to the ground. He had seen this determined look before, back when he was hopeful about his own soulmate. He was young and eager and wished that his soulmate was everything he wanted. As much as he hated to admit it, he didn't want to see Victor get hurt. Victor was like a son to him. He couldn’t imagine him going through the same let down he had. 

“You say that now, but what about in five years? This isn’t something you can just stop being interested in. This isn’t like ice skating. You can’t just quit,” he lectured.

He clicked his tongue. “You did.”

“And that’s why I’m telling you to take it slow. Don’t do anything rash. Nowadays, having a soulmate doesn't change anything,” he muttered, his eyes focusing on the audience instead of his student. “You don’t have to leave the ice and give up your life just for someone a clock says you're destined to be with.”

“But what if I want to?”

“You shouldn’t do anything rash. You don't want to scare her by rushing into a relationship, trust me."

"But my soulmate will understand."

Yakov paused. Victor gave his soulmate a lot more credit than deserving. He knew Victor wanted a romantic relationship with this person, but he didn’t know if his soulmate did in return. “Will she?”

Victor affectionately places his wrist to his heart. "I know it."

"You don't even know her," Yakov argued, his eyes narrowed. He couldn’t understand how Victor had made all of these assumptions about his soulmate. He hadn’t even met them yet. His expectations would surely be too high. He silently prayed for his soulmate to live up to them. He didn’t want to imagine if they didn’t. 

"Yes, but I will soon,” he stated, his blue eyes glued to the watch. 

Yakov rolled his dark eyes. "You don't want to miss her by looking down at your clock,” he pointed out.

"Only five minutes," Victor stated, a dreamy expression on his face. 

Yakov furrowed his bushy eyebrows, frustrated with Victor’s obsession with the clock. "Are you even listening to me?"

Victor smirked, flashing Yakov with his signature smile. "Do I ever?"

Yakov groaned. He was always like this, stubborn as anything. He would never give up on this, especially on matters regarding his soulmate. He supposed they were more similar then he would like to admit. 

"Look, go warm up,” he commanded, trying to talk some sense into Victor. “You only have a few minutes on the ice left."

Victor waved his hand dismissively. "I'm skipping the practice skate,” he stated nonchalantly.

"What?" Yakov growled, angrily. He knew that Victor was obsessed with this whole soulmate ordeal, but he didn’t think it was this bad. Victor had never skipped a practice skate. He always said something about good luck or karma or some sort of destiny related situation that he had to test out the ice. And now, he would throw away his ritual just for a few extra minutes to stare a red numbers counting down. 

"You better not be throwing away your career for your dumb soulmate. She's not going to love a loser."

"I'm not throwing my career away. I'm just trying to relax. If I go on the ice stressed, I'll miss a jump and be even more stressed,” he explained smoothly, even if he really did just want to spend his last few minutes dreaming about his soulmate instead. “No, I'm skipping the practice."

"You're not thinking straight.”

He leaned on the banister, his head cupped in his hands. He looked at his reflection in the clean ice. His blue eyes stared back at him. He wondered if his soulmate was thinking about him right now. He wondered if his soulmate even thought of him at all. "Love does that."

Yakov shook his head, frustrated with Victor’s comments. "You don't know the slightest thing about love."

"Either do you, apparently,” Victor jeered.  

Yakov groaned, pinching the bridge of his nose in frustration. "I'm only trying to do what's best for you. I don't want you to get hurt if it doesn't end up like you thought."

He flashed him a smile. "Thanks, but you're not going to change my mind." 

Yakov scowled. He had enough fighting with Victor for the time being. He really didn’t want to ruin the moment for Victor, even if it did end up hurting his career. Victor’s scores from the previous night would probably make up for any small flourishes that weren’t exactly perfect. Plus, his biggest competition was a nineteen year old skater from Canada. He didn’t exactly have to be perfect to win this time. 

"Fine, whatever. Just go sit down,” Yakov muttered.

“Very well,” Victor agreed. He gazed at his reflection in the ice once more before returning to his seat in the competitor’s section. He situated himself on one of the fold-able chairs, trying to get a perfect view of the audience. He hunched over, staring at his soulmate clock countdown mere seconds now. 

“The practice skate is over. Everyone, please return to your seats.”

Due to his high scores in the short program, Victor knew he would be skating last. He assured himself that he could afford to relax for a bit. He was usually against watching his competition, but maybe he could spare a few minutes and watch. Surely critiquing his fellow skaters could help him relax before meeting his soulmate.

"Our first skater representing Japan: Yuuri Katsuki."

Victor looked up, his eyes locking on the skater on the ice. Victor gasped, his mouth opening slightly. The skater was downright beautiful.

He had dark, jagged hair that was slicked back to show off his round face. His features were soft with deep mahogany brown eyes that Victor could tell had hints of gold and red. 

He was wearing a tight fitting blue and black costume with a small skirt at the waist, which, despite all of the crystals and sparkles, didn’t seem gaudy at all under the bright lights. Instead, the costume fit snugly, accentuated his long legs and feminine body. He was a bit curvy, with wide hips which made Victor want him all the more.

Victor wondered why he had never noticed this skater before. He usually scoped out the competition and got friendly - a bit too friendly  - with his fellow competitors. But somehow, he of all skaters had eluded his grasp. 

He skated onto the ice, his eyes downcast. He was different from the other competitors. He didn’t seem to have any of the poise of confidence of a skater who made it to the Grand Prix Finals. His entrance was shaky at best, probably nervous from his scores from the previous night. His footwork was definitely sloppy and he over-rotated most of his jumps, landing face first on the ice during his routine. And even with all of that, Victor simply couldn’t take his eyes off of him.

Victor could feel his wrist buzzing, but he didn't need to look to confirm his suspicions.

Victor had found his soulmate.

_To be continued...?_


	2. Chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hi all! I apologize for how long this took. I've been in a bit of a slump with finals and all these papers. But I already have the next few chapters planned so I hope to update quicker!  
> Thank you all for the insane amount of comments and feedback I have! I am so appreciative!!  
> I hope you enjoy this chapter!

Yuuri didn’t believe in soulmates. 

Scratch that, Yuuri didn’t believe he personally had a soulmate.

Sure he had seen all of the movies, even read those ridiculous romance books his sister owned; and yet, it didn’t seem possible to him. To be bound by some magical watch that could determine who he was supposed to love? 

Yuuri found it so farfetched. He couldn’t believe that a watch could determine who he was supposed to love for the rest of his life. A watch was a piece of metal and plastic. It didn’t have emotions or feelings or any ability other than counting down the time he would look into his soulmate’s eyes. He never thought he could meet someone who could instantly be his match, his other half, his soulmate just by locking eyes.

Besides, he was too young and too ambitious to think about his soulmate. He was twenty three and needed to start thinking about his focus in life. He wanted to win figure skating competitions, not live domestically with his supposed life time partner. 

The mere thought of having a soulmate hadn’t crossed his mind for three years, that was, until the Grand Prix Finals.

“Any luck finding your soulmate?“ Yuuko asked from behind the counter. She was absentmindedly putting a few of the stray skates away when Yuuri had come by the ice rink. He had always done this; coming in when everyone else had gone. She supposed he was just shy. Even as a professional figure skater, he was always private about his routines, only performing them at major events. He wasn’t the kind of person who liked all of the attention that came with being a famous figure skater anyways. He merely just wanted to skate. 

 "No, not really,” Yuuri admitted sheepishly. He scratched the back of his neck awkwardly. He didn’t exactly want to talk about his disaster with his soulmate. He was still a bit embarrassed about the whole situation. 

He had heard his name called, the announcer’s voice radiating through the stadium. He knew he would be performing first, which was always a disadvantage; but Yuuri knew his free performance was strong enough to place him on the podium, even after messing up his short performance. He effortlessly glided onto the clean ice, trying hard to appear confident in front of a large audience despite his growing anxiety. 

He took his starting position on the center of the ice. He scanned the audience, hoping to catch a glimpse of his idol when his soulmate watch had gone off. He could feel his wrist buzzing, but the soft music of his free program had already began to fill the stadium. 

Yuuri began to falter. He couldn’t focus, not with his wrist begging for attention as he skated. His jumps were clumsy and his expressions didn’t match the music. In the end, his disastrous showing had him coming in one hundred points behind the winner. 

In the midst of losing so poorly, Yuuri had booked the first flight home. He was desperate to leave as soon as possible, running away before he could be embarrassed further. He didn’t exactly think about how he may have ignored his soulmate until he was far away, back in Hasetsu.

“You should post your watch on those forum websites. Or on Instagram,” she beamed with a radiant smile. She was always so adamant about soulmates it made Yuuri anxious. It had been almost two months since his watch went off, yet nobody had come forward to say that they were his soulmate. 

He supposed it was too late now. His soulmate probably found else to be their partner. He just hoped that they were happy. The stadium was rather large after all, and he could have locked eyes with anyone there. 

“I just don’t want to attract crazy fans,” he stated halfheartedly. True, he didn’t particularly want to be partnered with someone who liked him only for his fame, but that wasn’t exactly why he had ignored his soulmate. 

She paused, pursing her bottom lip out as if she wasn’t satisfied with Yuuri’s lame excuse. "But you might find you soulmate. It’s worth a chance." 

"Is it?” he asked miserably. Besides, since he was famous - or at least sort of famous. He wouldn’t put himself on the top of the figure skating tier like Jean-Jacques Leroy or Victor Nikiforov, but he was famous enough to have wild fans. He knew how fans were when famous people revealed their soul mates. They would lie about their watches, desperate for money or fame. He didn’t exactly want to take the chance and end up with someone like that. 

His mind immediately thought of when Victor revealed his soulmate watch in an interview. He was young back then, still sporting his long hair. He has dedicated his winning senior debut to his soulmate. He gave the interviewer a toothy smile as he showed off the time on his watch, desperate to match with his soulmate early. Yuuri had watched the interview six times, silently hoped his matched, but he knew that it was just wishful thinking. 

For the next year, Victor had received a barrage of desperate people pretending to be his soulmate. His fans claimed his watch was broken or that their times matched, but time and time again, it had all be fake. They were desperate for someone as perfect as Victor to be their soulmate. Yuuri supposed he was too.

“To meet your soulmate, it is." 

"Don’t you think they would’ve said something by now?” Yuuri stared at his wrist, his brown eyes memorizing the bright red zeroes. He had practically given up all hope of ever meeting his soulmate again. It had been so long since his watch went off; he assumed his soulmate had moved on. He supposed his soulmate was happy with someone else by this point. Yuuri supposed it was for the best. Maybe he could move on as well. 

“It’s only been a month. Give it time,” she assured him with a small smile. 

“A month and a half,” Yuuri muttered, situating himself on one of the wooden benches along the edge of the rink. He knew he was just being unreasonable. A month and a half was abysmal compared to the twenty three years he and his soulmate had to wait. And yet, it had been the longest month and a half of his life . He had secretly wondered if anyone would come forward and respond, but the hopes of that ever happening dwindled with each passing day. 

 "Oh come on, don’t be this way.“ Yuuko said, hopping over the counter. "This is like a modern Cinderella! Someone out there is trying to find the fit to your glass slipper!" 

"My life isn’t a Disney movie,” he protested. He just wanted a normal life, one without a cliche fairytale ending where he had to publicly announce his private life in order to find his true love. He wasn’t like Victor who would adamantly flaunt his soulmate watch at any given opportunity. 

Besides, he found it almost risque to flaunt his clock, especially in his culture. In Japan, soulmate watches were private between a soulmate and their match and it was looked down upon to show one in public. And as much as some people hated that, Yuuri was content to never show his watch to anyone.

“It could be!” she exclaimed, cupping her wrist to her heart. 

Yuuri rolled his brown eyes. Yuuko was always like this when it came to soulmates, especially when it came to Yuuri’s soulmate. He supposed that she wanted some excitement in her life. She had met her soulmate when she was six, a mutual acquaintance of Yuuri’s, and had been together ever since. The monotony was boring and she looked for relief through Yuuri’s pitiful love life. 

“I’m sure your soulmate is trying to find you as well,” she assured Yuuri with a small smile. 

"How can you be so sure they’re looking for me?” he asked skeptically. He rummaged around his black duffle bag for his finger-less gloves and black skates. His skates were pretty worn, looking as if they belonged to the public rink rather than a professional skater’s. He had gotten a few years back when he was accepted into university and had failed to change them. Yuuri supposed would probably have to buy a new pair if he was going to compete again this season, but the chances were looking rather slim. 

“Because that’s what soulmates do!” she proclaimed as if it were obvious. To Yuuri, Yuuko always seemed to know everything about soulmates. She was probably his largest source of soulmate knowledge, aside from the Internet. When they were growing up, Yuuri always listened to her expertise when it came to the topic. Now, he isn’t so sure.

“Maybe my soulmate doesn’t want to end up with me. I’d be embarrassed too if I found out my soulmate was a failure,” he suggested, bitterly, his eyes more focused on lacing up his skates. He didn’t particularly want to see Yuuko’s weary look when he had told her the truth.  

“You’re being dramatic. Soulmates love each other no matter what." 

"I don’t deserve a soulmate,” he muttered softly in a voice barely above a whisper. He silently hoped Yuuko wouldn’t hear his pathetic comments, or at least didn’t respond. 

Yuuko opened her mouth to respond but immediately closed it. 

Yuuri paused before adding. “I don’t want one anyways." 

Sure, maybe he was being a bit dramatic about the entire situation, but that didn’t change how he truly felt about the whole soulmate idea in general. The finals was the day Yuuri had planned to speak to his idol, working up enough courage with the help of his fellow rinkmates. After his free program, he had planned to speak to him, maybe even ask for a few tips or take a photo. Everything was supposed to be perfect.

And yet, his soulmate had to be at the finals. His soulmate had to lock eyes with him as he took center stage. His soulmate had to ruin his free performance. His soulmate had to ruin any chance he had at finally speaking to Victor.

"You don’t want a soulmate?" 

Yuuri looked down at his wrist, the red zeroes staring back at him. He never really thought about having a soulmate in the first place, that being reserved for people much better than him.  

Yuuri inhaled sharply. ”…I’m not sure anymore.“ 

 "You’re just being melodramatic. In sure once you meet them, you’ll believe again.” She offered him a small smile. “It’s destiny." 

"Sure, destiny,” he spat, coldly. He balled up his hands, his finger nails making crescent shaped imprints on his soft palms. “If I’m so destined to be with my soulmate, wouldn’t these clocks make us meet again?”  

"That’s not how it works." 

"Think about it!” Yuuri started, his voice raised. He clenched his fist tighter, his knuckles going white. He could feel his chest tighten, his heart beating faster as he struggled to breathe. “Why should a dumb clock tell me who I’m meant to be with? A clock doesn’t know me! Why can’t I figure it out for myself?" 

She shook her head once. "The whole point is that you don’t have to. That you won’t end up with the wrong person in life. The watch knows." 

"Well I don’t want it. This stupid watch made me distracted. I was supposed to have the best performance of my career, even talk to my childhood idol. And then, of all times, my watch had to go off!” he shouted, angrily. He began to grab at the watch, desperate to pull it from its place locked around his left wrist with no avail. He had tried before to claw it off before, even attempted to smash it with a wrench; but, alas, nothing worked. Nothing could rid Yuuri of his supposed destiny.

“You still could’ve talked to Victor,” Yuuko offered, pulling his hands away from his watch. Yuuri knew she hated seeing him like this, clawing at his wrist like an animal, but he couldn’t help himself.  

He scowled. “I was over 100 points behind. I had messed up all of my jumps." 

"So? I bet he would’ve understood the situation.” She sat down on the bench next to Yuuri, hoping she could provide some comfort. “He has a soulmate, right? He even dedicated his performance to her." 

"Yeah, so?” Yuuri asked bitterly. Of course Victor would have a soulmate. Yuuri could picture her now. A beautiful woman with a warm smile and a hour-glass body. A picture perfect soulmate that comforted him when he was upset and sang him praises and only helped his performance flourish. All Yuuri’s soulmate did was ruin his performance and his career. He didn’t even know if he could compete next year. He didn’t know if he could show his face to Victor ever again.

“So he would’ve understood, is what I’m saying." 

"And what if he didn’t?” His eyes focused on his skates, desperate not to match Yuuko’s gaze. “What if he laughed at me and found me pathetic?" 

"No one would,” she assured him, placing a hand on his shoulder. 

Yuuri pushed her hand off lightly  "It doesn’t matter now,“ he muttered, trying to clear his mind of his mistakes. All of this soulmate talk had exhausted him. 

"I’m just going to skate.”

"O-of course. Would you like me to-" 

"No,” he interrupted coldly, before Yuuko could ask. 

Yuuko sighed, but pretended she wasn’t hurt by his comment. “Oh um…”

He sighed, inhaling once. He didn’t mean to be so harsh. He knew he could get a bit agitated when he was upset, but he couldn’t help himself.  He came here to skate, not get lectured about waiting for his soulmate from his friend. He just wanted to escape from being bound from his soulmate, if just for a few moments.

 "I just…I just want to be alone. Please.“ 

Yuuko blinked once, understandingly. "Okay. I’m sorry. I’m going to head out. Feel free to call me if you want to talk." 

He nodded in response and watched her as she left the rink, the metal door closing softly behind her.

Yuuri exhaled, slipping off the blade guards and stepping onto the ice. He hadn't been on the ice since the Grand Prix Finals, but it felt the same as it had back then. The cool, crisp air nipping at his face, his nose going pink at the tip. It felt almost freeing. On the ice, he wasn’t a drop-out university student or a world-renowned skater or someone else’s soulmate. He was just Yuuri. And that’s all he really wanted.

He silently wondered if he would return this season to skate. After the embarrassment of last season, he didn’t know if he could. He had performed worse than he ever had before, shaming him to suddenly come back home to Hasetsu. He had ended up taking a break from university and his supposed professional skating to help his parents with their failing business. It was probably for the best. 

He placed his blue glasses on the side, grabbing his iPod in one movement. He shuffled through a few songs before landing on one in particular. He had learned the routine by heart, he had certainly watched it enough times to learn it. It was rather difficult with four quads, but Yuuri knew he could perform it. 

Victor’s Stay Close To Me. 

No other routine had an impact of Yuuri like this had. When he had watched his performance on television, he couldn’t believe what he had witnessed. He knew Victor was a legendary skater, but this routine was beyond words. The way his figure moved gracefully through his step routine, his back arching into a spread eagle. The way he landed his signature quadruple flip with easy, his golden skates glinting off of the stadium lights. Yuuri was completely memorized. His only regret was not waiting around long enough to see him perform it live.

He took the first position, center stage on the ice, the strong tenor voice vibrating in his ears. He has thought about Victor, how carefree he was on the ice. That was how he wanted to be: no inhibitions, no boundaries, no soulmate. Just him and the ice. 

He ended on the final pose, his hands crossed above his waist. The sound of his breath panting echoed in the silent ice rink, 

"That was beautiful,” a foreign voice said, clapping his hands together enthusiastically. 

Yuuri faltered, losing his balance of a moment. 

“I-um…” Yuuri stumbled to say, his tongue thick in his mouth. From where he was, he couldn’t exactly determine who the figure was without his glasses on, but he was certain he knew who had walked in on him. Yuuri could distinguish that voice anywhere. It was a smooth a charming voice with a hint of a Russian flair accenting every word. 

“I can see your emotions,” the voice continued, not phased by Yuuri’s response - or rather, lack of response. “I can hear the music coming from your body. Dare I say, that was better than my own. Truly a wonderful performance." 

"Um…how-?” Yuuri stammered but was immediately interrupted before he could finish.

“You know, you’re a hard person to find,” the stranger admitted. He leaned over on the banister, his head resting in the palm of his hand. He looked at Yuuri with a dreamy expression. “I looked all over after the Finals but I couldn’t find you. I asked a few skaters and they didn’t where you lived either. I’d almost given up until I found your Instagram and this place was geo-tagged. Booked the first flight possible. Glad I got here when I did or I would’ve missed a beautiful show. To see the person I dedicated my performance to return the favour? It truly makes my heart soar." 

Yuuri stood dumbfounded. Had he really just said that about a mere practice performance he copied? His movements were slow and clumsy, nothing at all like the grace and poise of the original routine. He couldn’t even land his signature quadruple flip. He didn’t know what the stranger was referencing to but it surely wasn’t the routine he just performed. 

Yuuri shook his head, unable to comprehend what he had just heard. "I’m sorry but um what are you doing here?” he finally asked, rationally. 

“Where are my manners? Let me introduce myself. I’m Victor Nikiforov, but you probably already know that, and I’m your soulmate.”

 

_To be continued...?_

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks for reading! I hope you like this super canon divergence from the plot. I wanted to make this more realistic and my own so I hope you all don't mind how different it is.  
> Also, I'm sorry this is so short but I hope to have the next part up by Friday so hopefully that will make up for it...  
> Please leave a comment/kudos if you liked it! I am so appreciative of the overwhelming response I had on the first part!  
> Be sure to check out my tumblr jesse-rae-on-ice to stay up to date. Also, if anyone ever wants to make me fan art, I'd love to see it!!


	3. Chapter 3

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So I know I promised I would have a chapter earlier, but I had a lot of exams so you'll have to excuse my timing.  
> Also, can we appreciate how amazing episode 10 was? I am shook. That was amazing and everything I could ask for. I don't think it could be topped but I said that about every episode so far so...  
> Anyways, please enjoy this new chapter!!

“What?” the skater asked, fumbling to put on his blue rimmed glasses.

Victor chuckled, finding his soulmate’s clumsy actions rather endearing. He wasn’t used to professional figure skaters being so clumsy in general - his coach was rather adamant about being elegant on and off the ice - so his actions were rather refreshing. He supposed if a famous figure skater showed up on his doorstep claiming to be his soulmate, Victor would react the same way as well.

“Am I not saying this right?” he asked more to himself than to Yuuri. He placed a finger on his lips, determined to figure out a solution "Do you not understand? You seem to speak English well, but do you not understand?”

“I…“ 

Victor exhaled, running his hand through his silver hair. He had regretted not learning anything aside from the basic Japanese phrases he found in some dictionary. He knew he should have prepared more but he was merely so excited to see his soulmate once more. He had hastily gotten approval from his vet to send his precious dog abbroad before packing up his belongings in boxes for storage. He impatiently booked the first available flight from Russia to Japan, first class of course. It was a rather bold decision, but he knew it would ultimately be the right choice. He couldn’t live another day without Yuuri in his life.

"You and me,” he said slowly, emphasizing every symbol in hopes his soulmate had a basic grasp of the language. In a feeble attempt to get him to understand, he pointed between them. “We’re soulmates.’

Yuuri raised an eyebrow at Victor’s comment, as if he wasn’t fully convinced yet.

Victor groaned, a bit frustrated that he couldn’t get his message across. He didn’t think this would be so difficult. He had always assumed it would be like the movies where his partner would immediately understand and they would kiss in the rain and promptly get married. He thought love had transcended any language barriers, anyways. 

“Look, my wrist!” he finally exclaimed, extended his wrist to his soulmate’s face.

Yuuri squinted at Victor’s outstretched watch. He still seemed unconvinced about the entire situation.

"See it went off! When you took center stage and we locked eyes,” he explained, his arms waving around dramatically, as if to emphasize his feelings towards the young skater.

He had thought about nothing but him for the past six weeks and three days. The skater’s performance was permanently ingrained into his mind. Every step sequence, every flick of his wrist, every mistake, all memorized down to the last sequin on his blue costume. 

“I was smitten,” Victor admitted, a dreamy expression on his face. Victor had to constantly remind himself that it was, in fact, real. It all seemed like part of some cliche romantic comedy movie. He knew he shouldn’t believe in love at first sight, and yet, he knew from the moment he saw him that he was in love.

Victor silently wished he could go back to that night. He wanted nothing more than to bombard the young man after his performance, give him a congratulatory kiss, and tell him that he had dedicated his last performance to him. He cursed Yakov under his breath when he was whisked away to stretch in order to prepare for his own routine. 

“When I had first saw you, I knew you were my soulmate,” Victor explained. His blue eyes watched as his soulmate grabbed his blade guards from off the side of the rink. 

"What?” he sputtered. A bit shocked by Victor’s bold comment, his blade guards unceremoniously dropped from his hands and clattered at Victor’s feet.

“Your performance,” Victor clarified, reaching down to pick up his blade guards. They were silver and red with a small dog sticker peeling off of one side. They weren’t in the best condition with some of the plastic banged up slightly. He wondered how long Yuuri had these guard blades for.

His held them out for his soulmate to grab, his delicate fingers brushing against his own. Victor savored the touch, as brief as it was. He wanted nothing more than to hold those soft hands, intertwining their delicate fingers together. 

“Back and the Grand Prix. It’s okay that you didn’t do well. You were distracted by your watch, no? That’s why you placed so low,” Victor remarked, trying to justify why he had made so many mistakes. 

He had seen Yuuri’s performances at the qualifying rounds on television. They were nothing too special technically - only having two quad which he barely landed - but were saved by his outstanding performance score. His step sequences and tiny flourishes gave life to an almost pitiful routine. 

However, his showing at the Finals were unlike any of the qualifying rounds. His face had lacked all of his usual emotions; rather, his mind seemed to be focused on everything but his performance.

"Eh…I…” his soulmate said, as if he was unable to comprehend the situation before him. 

“I know you could do better, of course,” he claimed as if he knew Yuuri for years. And from the hours of videos Victor had watched, it was safe to say that he knew all there was about his soulmate’s skating career.

From a quick google search, he knew his soulmate was among the best skaters in the world and the top rated figure skater from Japan. He had premiered in the senior division at age nineteen, rather late for a professional. Victor knew from interviews that he rarely landed a quadruple slachow out of practice and his signature move was a triple toe loop combination. Overall, the information regarding his skating life was rather easy to find. 

His private life, however, remained a mystery.

He mostly relied on grainy pictures from a friend’s Instagram account back in the United States. He had even found a shaky video from what seemed to be a college party a few years prior. His soulmate was admittedly drunk with a tie wrapped around his head, dancing seductively on what Victor assumed to be a pole, but he couldn’t quite tell. Yet, it told him nothing about the person his soulmate was. He supposed he would have to figure that out all by himself. 

“I watched all of your previous routines. And I just say you perform the hardest routine in history, flawlessly.”

He spent hours watching as many videos of his past routines, neglecting his practices at the rink. Everything from his junior debut, which was rather lack luster, to local competitions in Japan. Of all the routines he had performed, his favourite was certainly this Stay Close to Me rendition. 

“Mmm, thanks,” Yuuri murmured halfheartedly. He brushing past him as he exited the rink, quick to get off of the ice. 

Victor’s eyes widened. “Ah, he does speak. I was worried you didn’t know English. Please, let me hear your beautiful voice more. Say something,” he demanded. 

"Um…hi?” his soulmate said. Victor found his voice uneasy, a bit shaky when compared to his interviews. He merely shrugged off any doubts and decided it was because he hadn’t practiced his English in a few months.

“Such a beautiful voice,” Victor praised, genuinely. He had waited weeks just to hear his soulmate speak. Sure, he had heard his timid voice in interviews, but it was so different in person. 

“You know, I’ve been counting down the years until I could hear your voice. I calculated it up to the exact day! Had it marked on my calendar for years! Didn’t you do the same?”

“Actually it was covered,” Yuuri explained, his eyes adverted to the ground.

Victor mentally kicked himself for being culturally offensive. He knew East Asian countries were more private about their soulmate watches than in Europe, but he didn’t do any research. He supposed he would have to learn if they were going to live here. 

“But you must’ve imagined, right? Did you imagine me? You are everything I’ve imagined,” he declared, the words easily falling from his lips.

Honestly, he had never really had a clear image of what his soulmate would be. Never really went into specifics about height or weight or gender. But something just seemed right when it came to Yuuri. He was gorgeous with his deep brown eyes with flakes of gold and soft plump lips that begged to be kissed. 

Sure, lots of people would say he wasn’t conventionally beautiful like they would say Victor was. But Victor was never one to be conventional. He would continue to surprise everyone, and he supposed Yuuri being his soulmate should be considered a large enough surprise. 

"You and me, together forever,” he sighed, a breath of warm vapor escaping from his lips into the crisp air.

Victor couldn’t wait to announce his new found love to the world. He wanted everyone to know that the beautiful man standing before him was his soulmate. He knew not everyone would take it well, especially back in his homeland, but he simply couldn’t care. If he was happy, it shouldn’t matter what anyone else thought about his soulmate. 

"I never really thought of that-” his soulmate started, but was immediately cut off.

“Mmm I suppose it doesn’t matter now that we’ve found each other again. And to have a soulmate such a fan of mine. It brings such joy to my heart,” he explained. He brought his wrist to his heart, a habit he had developed over the years after his mother told him that his soulmate could feel an intimate connection through his watch. And although Victor learned that wasn’t true in the slightest, he kept pretending for his own sake. 

“Thanks,” his soulmate muttered halfheartedly. He situated himself on the far side of one of the wooden benches near the edge of the rink. He desperately tried to remove his ice skates from his feet but his awkward movements made his fingers stumble around the laces. 

“It’s such a shame you left so early from the Finals, though. I waited for you at the Gala but you never showed. A shame, really. I would’ve loved to dance with you,” Victor tutted almost bitterly.

He had attended the fancy after party gala, albeit quite bored. Stiff celebrations weren’t really his favourite scene - he would rather be drinking with some of the fellow competitors at a bar - but Yakov convinced him that he needed to go. After all, everyone had wanted to see the five time skating champion. 

Yet, Victor wasn’t particularly interested in all of formalities and congratulations. All his mind could think of was his soulmate. His soulmate with beautiful brown eyes and curvaceous body. 

His eyes were glued to the door, wondering when his soulmate would walk through. He was surely invited to the after party, being a competitor and all. He couldn’t wait to see his beautiful face, pull him into a dance, and make love to him in his spacious hotel room. And yet, the entire evening ticked on and not once did his soulmate come in. 

Yakov had to finally drag him away after he had too much to drink and was making an utter fool of himself.

“I had to get home,” he argued, his brown eyes locked on his skates instead of Victor.

“Yes, your home.” Victor clicked his tongue, scoping out the ice rink. It was different from the ice rink he skated in during competitions. The ice was scratched up by years of amateurs skaters and the boards surrounding the rink were less than sturdy. Victor wondered how a professional skater could even train in such a facility. It didn’t seem to be the sort of place that would attract private coaches, especially at the level Yuuri was currently skating for. The rink was far different from the decadent lifestyle he had become accustomed to as a world-class skater. 

This Ice Castle was simple and didn’t seem to draw too much attention. The walls were painted a pale blue and was peeling a tad under a large poster of Yuuri. The ice itself was the main attraction, encompassing most of the space in the cramped stadium. Aside from the ice, there was a small window near the back corner where people could rent skates and a few wooden benches for outsiders to watch. It was plain but Victor could tell it was cozy. 

He knew he would have to get used to this: a life of domesticity. He had neglected the simple things in life in favor of his rise to fame. He supposed it was time to start thinking about settling down and possibly retiring, anyways.

“You live here? It’s quite quaint,” he admitted. “You know, I’ve always wanted to visit Japan and now I have a reason. I swear I would’ve been here sooner but well you know. Everything was in Japanese and google translate can only get you so far.”

“Eh…”

“Shy one, aren’t you? You don’t need to be shy,” he assured him, his voice low and sultry. Victor leaned in, his lips just inches from his soulmates.

“I-” 

Victor chuckled, enjoying the sight of seeing his soulmate flustered. “I assure you, I’m not as intimidating as I appear on the ice. I can be nice. Besides, I love someone who will dominate me in bed.”

“Yes but…” Yuuri sputtered, his ears turning a bright red shade. 

“So it’s settled!” Victor clapped his hands together once. “You will take me to your home so we can start our lives together.”

Yuuri faltered, almost falling over on the bench. He turned towards Victor, an almost irritated expression on his face. “What? Why would I do that?”

“Because we’re soulmates!”

His soulmate looked up over the rim of his blue glasses. Victor wondered how he was processing this information. He had expected his soulmate to faint, or at the very least grab him for a kiss. He didn’t quite expect the reaction he had received.

Yuuri blinked before letting out a laugh. It wasn’t a genuine laugh as if something were funny. It wasn’t even like the laughs he had forced during his interviews. No, this laugh was bitter and cold, as if he were mocking Victor. 

Victor furrowed his eyebrows. He couldn’t understand why his soulmate was laughing at all times. He supposed it was possibly a cultural difference he didn’t quite understand. Maybe he was simply so happy that Victor was his soulmate that he had laughed? 

“No we’re not,” he muttered rationally.

“What do you mean?” Victor asked, a hint of desperation in his voice.

Naturally, Victor had begun to worry. Had his soulmate’s watch not gone off at the same time as his? Had he found the wrong person? He was sure this was the man that haunted his dreams, but what if it were someone else? What if he had been searching for the wrong person this entire time?

He had heard of stories about mismatched soulmates but didn’t think it was true outside of movies. It was rare but it did occasionally happen where only one person in the pair’s watch would go off and the other had a soulmate somewhere else. He couldn’t imagine what he would do if he knew he wasn’t the perfect match for his soulmate. 

“Our eyes locked and our watches went off at the same time! That means we’re meant to be together. That’s how it works. Is that different in Japan or something? I thought it was universal,” Victor proclaimed desperately, his words spilling out too quickly.

Yuuri paused, taking in the words Victor had said. "You can’t be my soulmate.”

Victor inhaled sharply. “Why not?”

“It’s just…it’s impossible.”

“What are you talking about?” Victor asked, not exactly sure if he wanted an answer at this point. 

Yuuri blinked once before asking, “did someone set you up?" 

"What?” Victor asked, not believing the words his soulmate had just asked of him. He couldn’t believe his soulmate would think that he had traveled all the way from Russia to Japan as some sort of elaborate set-up. 

Yuuri looked down at his feet, adverting his eyes from Victor’s gaze.

“Are you here to laugh at me?”

“Laugh at you? For what?”

“For my terrible performance. You’re here to tell me how pathetic it was that I was distracted by my watch going off during my performance. You’re hear to tell me that I should step down as a skater. Don’t bother, I’m not going to compete again anyways.”

Victor’s eyes widened. “I would never say that to anyone, let alone my soulmate.” 

“Is this some sort of sick joke?” he asked, his voice growing angry. He turned around to face Victor, his body shaking slightly. 

“I would never joke about my soulmate." 

"Someone must’ve! My soulmate can’t be the Victor Nikiforov. This can’t be real,” he rationalized, his eyes glancing down at his watch. From where Victor was seated, he could see the watch was 

Victor opened his mouth but his tongue felt heavy in his mouth. Words always came naturally to him. He always had some sort of charming remark or some witty comeback; and yet, he was speechless. The words he wanted to say were unable to form.

“You’re Victor Nikiforov. You’re a living legend. You’re my idol. I don’t deserve you. You must be mistaken,” he stated, his voice barely audible, as if he didn’t want Victor to hear.

Victor’s expression softened and sat beside his soulmate.

“I assure you, I’m not mistaken. You stepped out on the ice and since then, I couldn’t stop thinking about you. Almost two months and I’ve had nothing on my mind but you. You don’t know how awful those months were not knowing what happened to you. I thought you died or something! I had thought of nothing but you since I saw you. You and your dark eyes and fluid movements and beautiful body. My rink mates have gotten pretty sick of me going on and on about you,” he stated, trying to convince Yuuri that they were soulmates.

“You could’ve locked eyes with anyone in the audience." 

"But I didn’t,” he claimed, any doubt that Yuuri was his soulmate were pushed aside. 

Victor exhaled, carding his hands through his hair. He didn’t think it would be this difficult to convince anyone that he was his soulmate. He had dreamed about this day of years and yet it wasn’t at all like he had expected. He thought being a famous figure skater would have his soulmate practically begging for him, desperate to get married at the mere notion. 

He sighed, his warm air creating a trail of smoke. He knew he would have to try to convince him, no matter the torture. "How can I convince you that you’re my missing half?”

“…I don’t know,” he responded, hopelessly.

“Would you like to watch the footage? There’s probably some tape of me watching my watch go off. Or I could call my coach! He’s a witness!” Victor quickly fumbled around in his jacket pockets, desperate for his cellphone. He stumbled to type in his password before bringing up his contacts. He couldn’t care what time it was in Russia right now, but he knew he had to contact Yakov immediately, if that was what it took.

“Here I have him on speed dial.”

His soulmate waved his hands, shaking his head slightly. “That’s not necessary.”

“Then why don’t you believe me?” Victor exhaled miserably. He had explained it any way that he possibly could. He would get on his hands and knees and beg if that was what it took to convince him. 

“I saw you say in an interview that your watch went off the same time mine did in that interview after your skate." 

"You watched that?” his soulmate asked, his expression unreadable.

“Of course. I watched all of interviews and routines. I had to know as much about my soulmate as possible. I had to know more than just that that performance. You’re beautiful and the way you skate, sure it was shaky, but it was mesmerizing." 

Victor looked over at his soulmate. He had never seen someone look so sad. He wanted nothing more than to convince his soulmate that he was loved.

"And that performance right now? My stay close to me? That was how I pictured it should be performed. Yuuri, there’s no one else I want as my soulmate,” he insisted. He grabbed his soulmate’s shaking hands, hoping that he had swayed his soulmate.

“You keep saying that,” he mumbled, looking at his fingers laced with Victor’s.

Victor tilted his head to the right, not understanding what he was asking of him. “Saying what?” .

Yuuri looked up at him through his long eyelashes. “That we are soulmates.”

“Because we are,” he stated as if it were the most obvious thing in the world. “I wouldn’t be here if we weren’t. I wouldn’t have flown halfway around the world for nothing.”

“How can we be soulmates? We don’t even know each other,” he argued, his hands slowly pulling away from Victor’s. 

“Okay! Let’s start with the basics. I’m Victor and I like ice skating and dogs and long walks on the beach. Now what’s your name? I can’t keep calling you the beautiful skater from Japan.”

“Look, I’m flattered,” he began, standing up from his spot on the bench. He grabbed his duffle bag, shuffling all of his stray items inside before zipping it closed.

Victor smirked. “As you should be. I was rated sexiest man alive, after all.”

“But I don’t really believe in soulmates or destiny or fate,” he continued, unaffected by Victor’s attempts at his flirtatious charms. You should try finding your real soulmate.”

“You are my real soulmate,” Victor defended. 

“You should find someone else then,” he retorted, almost bitterly. “I know a dozen women who would want your attention.”

He blinked twice. Had he just heard his soulmate correctly? Was his soulmate actually rejecting him? Him? He was famous and rich and down-right sexy. What more could Yuuri want from him?

“You’re turning down your soulmate?”

“No-I just…” he struggled to say, but bit his lip.

:Then what is it?” Victor asked desperately. He reached for his soulmates hands, grabbing them in his own. “Is it that I’m a guy?“

His soulmate shook his head once, his eyes downcast. "That’s not it.”

“Is it because I’m famous?” Victor asked, hoping for some sort of explanation of why he was being rejected. 

“No.”

“Is it my past sex life? I swear those are all rumors,” he argued. Victor knew he was notorious as a playboy with an active sex life in the media, but things couldn’t be further from the truth. He hadn’t really had any romantic relationships, saving his love for his soulmate only. He had wondered where those rumors came from. He supposed the media liked to pretend that if he was as attractive as he was and was in no relationship, he had to be hooking up with everyone he laid eyes on. 

"No. I don’t care about that.”

"Then what is it? Is it me? Do you hate me? Resent me for winning the Grand Prix. If it makes you feel better, I could let you wear my medals!” Victor exclaimed in a feeble attempt to persuade his soulmate.

“No!” Yuuri shouted, his voice echoing around the silent ice rink. 

Victor paused, a bit taken aback by his reaction. 

“I’m…I’m just not ready,” his soulmate admitting, wincing slightly.

Victor let out a breath of air he didn’t realize he was holding in. 

“When will you be?”

“I don’t know,” he mumbled miserably.

Victor looked at his soulmate. He was trembling slightly, his eyes glancing everywhere but Victor’s direction. Now that Victor looked at him, he looked downright awful. In the dark lighting of the rink, Victor could tell that he had was scared. Behind his glasses, his eyes were glossy, almost on the verge of crying. Victor didn’t mean to make his soulmate cry. He honestly didn’t mean to come off so strong.

He supposed Yakov was right, as much as he hated to admit it. He probably shouldn’t have barreled into this man’s life, claiming to be in love when he clearly wasn’t ready. He had been so rash and so bold, he hadn’t even thought of how his soulmate would react. He didn’t even give Yuuri a chance to voice his opinion. Victor mentally punched himself for being the worst soulmate ever.

“I’d much rather focus on my skating. You should go back home.”

“I’m not leaving you. Not again,” Victor declared stubbornly. He immediately thought of the six weeks of torture and pain he had been in without his soulmate, almost as if a piece of him was missing. He had waited almost twenty seven years to meet his soulmate and yet it had felt so short in comparison to those six weeks. He knew it sounded cliche, but he didn’t think he could live one more day without his soulmate in his life.

“You’re my soulmate. And soulmates are supposed to be together forever? Have you ever thought of getting married and having three kids, maybe a few dogs?”

“Aren’t we getting ahead of ourselves?”

“Okay, okay, two kids then,” Victor commented playfully. 

“What?”

“Sorry. You’re right, I’m going too fast,” he admitted, scratching the back of his neck nervously. He simply couldn’t help himself. He had waited such a long time to meet his soulmate and now that he was in reach, he just couldn’t contain his excitement. 

"Look,” Yuuri said, facing Victor. “I don’t think I’m ready for this commitment right now. I just want to skate.”

He placed a finger to his lips, lost in his own thoughts. 

“You really want to just skate, huh?” he asked, a smile growing on his lips. He had come up with a fool-proof plan. One in which he could spend hours with his soulmate without any uncomfortable situations that came with dating.

“Yeah…” he said, absentmindedly untangling the knots in his headphones.

“How about instead I can be your coach?” Victor proposed.

“My coach?” he asked, his eyebrows furrowed. 

“Of course,” he exclaimed, patting Yuuri once on the back. “Who’s better coach than five time living legend Victor Nikiforov?”

He looked up at Victor, brown eyes meeting blue. “Don’t you want to compete this season?”

“I’ve been thinking about retiring,” Victor noted with a wave of his hand. "I’m getting too old. You know I’m 27 and all. I don’t know how much longer I could keep surprising the audience. They’re getting quite bored. As was I. I had all about lost my inspiration until I found you.“

"That’s very kind but you don’t want to waste your time on me,” he reasoned, his voice soft. “I’m a has-been, or a never-was. I’m already 23.”

“I didn’t win my first senior gold medal at a grand prix final until I was 21,” he explained. He had thought back to his first few years in the senior division. He was quite confident, after coming off of the high of the junior competition. No one had really posed much of a challenge until his senior division. 

Victor had flawless performances and yet he was still behind his older competitors, coming in silver in most of the large competitions. It wasn’t until he perfected his quadruple flip that he could finally win the gold he thought he deserved. 

"Yeah, but yore different,” Yuuri countered. “You are amazing, like that Russian kid.”

“Yura? He’s not better than you,” he commented, sincerely.

Victor knew Yuri had potential as a skater, especially as Russia’s new number one skater. He had reminded Victor a lot of himself at that age: brash overly confidently, and always trying to surprise the audience with increasingly difficult routines. He was arrogant in his technical score, but lacked any real emotions in his routines. 

Yuri never seemed to understand his own performance. He would follow what Yakov told him, never adding his own flair. He kept a rather stoic face, deep in thought as he skated on the ice. Victor wondered what sort of routine he would have for his senior debut this year. 

“He can at least land jumps in competition,” Yuuri remarked. 

"So what? I see how you skate. Your emotions and performance, that’s something I can’t teach. But your technical scores are where you’re lacking. And lucky for you, I can teach you a thing or two about that,” he said, smirking confidently. If there was one thing Victor had become good at, it was teaching others his technique. He supposed he had to after everyone in his rink had asked him how he had landed a quadruple flip at such a young age. Yakov knew he wanted Victor to take over for him as coach when he would eventually retire. He supposed this was what would eventually happen anyways. 

Yuuri paused, chewing on his bottom lip. "You actually think I’m good?”

“I think that if you’re amazing,” he replied sincerely, a small smile gracing his lips.“You think anyone can just perform stay close to me? I doubt even JJ or Chris could come close to doing what you just did. You amaze me.”

“I do?" 

"Of course. I want to be your coach. I want you to be a better skater. Plus, we can get to know each other better. You said we don’t know anything about each other so here’s our chance. It’s a win-win! You learn to skate and I learn more about you.”

Yuuri raised a thin eyebrow. “You’re serious about this?” he asked, his voice a bit shaky, as if he were unsure of the whole situation. 

“I know you’re skeptical, but just give me a chance. I promise I’ll be the best coach you’ve ever had.”

Victor held out his hand, his fingers trembling slightly. He didn’t know what would happen if Yuuri would decline him. Would he continue to stay with Yuuri in hopes of convincing him he was his soulmate? Or would he return to Russia, continuously living a monotonous life without his soulmate?

"So what do you say?”

Yuuri paused, his eyes fixated on Victor’s outstretched hand. Victor could tell his eyes were analyzing the situation, as if he were mulling over his options in his mind.

“Okay, Victor Nikiforov,” Yuuri began, taking Victor’s hand into his own. “You can be my coach.”

...To be continued??

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you for reading!  
> I really like playing around with the idea of Victor being too enthusiastic and rushing into the relationship and Yuuri being super demi!sexual in return (as canon divergent as that is). I hope you like that.  
> Also, comments/kudos are appreciated.  
> Plus, I'm looking for a beta or anyone who wants to edit the awful mistakes in my work...  
> Hope to see you in a week or two!!


	4. Chapter 4

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey all! I totally apologizing for not updating! I was so caught up in the holidays and seeing family I totally neglected writing. But now it's 2017 so I am trying to update more (#newyearnewme anyone?)!  
> I now have awesome betas @amaranthinecastiel and @adorkable-phangirl on tumblr. Please check them out because they are great!  
> I hope I haven't kept you all waiting too long. Also, if you're a fan of Harry Potter crossovers, please check out my other fic!  
> Please enjoy!
> 
> Chapter warnings: homophobic and racist language

“Alright, that’s enough for today," Victor claimed, panting slightly.

“Tired already?" Yuuri challenged with, his eyebrow raised, as if to antagonize Victor. He knew that they had been skating for at least six hours, but he knew he could work longer. He had built up an inhumane stamina trying to copy Victor when he was younger. He could probably train for another few hours before he grew tired, but he knew Victor probably couldn’t keep up.

It may come as a surprise, but Victor didn’t have nearly the amount of stamina Yuuri had. Yuuri supposed he didn’t practice as much as he did, not that he necessarily needed to. Victor was naturally talented and therefore didn’t need to train nearly as long as Yuuri had to.

"You don't want to hurt yourself. We did fourteen jumps today," Victor pointed out. He skated over to the edge of the ice, picking up his water bottle and placing it at his lips. He took a sip of his water before wiping his mouth and setting the bottle back on the boards.

"Fifteen if you count the warm up," Yuuri countered, his eyes drinking in the man in front of him. Even in the dim lighting of the skating rink, Yuuri thought he looked stunning. He was clad in a basic black t-shirt and grey sweatpants, but Yuuri supposed he could make any outfit look attractive. His platinum blond was hair was a bit disheveled but still retained its usual shine. Yuuri wondered if he was even real.

"See!"

"Ah, alright. I guess I'll have to go easy on you, old man," he said with a smirk, knowing fully well this gesture would antagonize Victor. He usually wasn’t one to be flippant, especially towards his coach, but something felt different with Victor. He supposed they simply had a strong relationship.

Yuuri simply couldn’t believe a month had already passed since Victor barged into his life claiming to be his soulmate. The person he had once idolized was standing before him, looking incredibly human with his hair matted and sweat dripping down his face.

And yet, something inside of him refused to believe that they were soulmates. His younger self would have wanted nothing more than the opportunity he was given; not everyone could say their celebrity crush was their soulmate. But Yuuri knew better than to rush into a relationship. He would surely let Victor down whether in a romantic or professional relationship. As selfish as it was, he supposed he would be less upset to ruin a professional relationship.

Besides, he knew Victor had only came to Japan because Yuuri was his soulmate. Yuuri knew he didn’t care about his lackluster figure skating ability and only agreed to be his coach to spend more time with him. It hurt slightly, knowing the truth, but Yuuri had accepted it. He knew it would be foolish to deny the Five Time World Champion from coaching him, his younger self would never forgive him if he did.

Victor pouted, his bottom lip pursing out slightly, much akin to a child who had just got caught stealing cookies before dinner. “I’m not old," he argued.

Yuuri chuckled at his comment. Yuuri had learned early on that the Russian skater hated being called old, despite his relative age in the figure skating world. He knew in the skating world where competitors only lasted until about the age of 25, Victor was considered rather old. But that didn't mean he couldn't keep up with the competition. He was 27 and could still beat anyone half his age. Besides, Yuuri wasn't one to talk when he was 23 himself.

"I just don’t have the stamina you do," Victor protested.

"Is that what you told the media when you quit?" Yuuri pressed lightheartedly, skating over to Victor. He grabbed his own bottle of water and pressed the top to his lips. "That you don't have the stamina?"

He shrugged. "I never told the media," Victor explained nonchalantly.

"You're going to have to tell them eventually. They keep showing up demanding answers,”  Yuuri noted, a bit of frustration present in his voice. He had been a bit upset with the manner in which Victor was handling the situation. After posting on instagram that he was on vacation in Hasetsu, reporters and fans alike had swarmed the area. They had wanted answers about his sudden disappearance from the skating world, and were desperate to do whatever it took to gather those answers.

At first, Yuuri was slightly grateful for the attention. He supposed that the extra attention could be positive for his lackluster skating career. Not to mention the profit his family had gotten from Victor’s publicity. His family had called it a blessing for increasing business for their failing hot spring. It had been the first time since Yuuri won nationals that they had to turn customers away and his parents couldn’t have been happier.

Now that it has been a month, he could tell they were all getting rather annoyed with the unwanted guests. He felt as though he could never be alone; he was constantly followed by a swarm of unwanted guests who insistently pressed Victor for any information. Victor, being Victor, had all but fed into their attention by providing coy messages, never once confirming or denying their suspicions.

Victor rested his head in his palm as if he were bored with the conversation. "It's not that big of a deal."

Yuuri furrowed his eyebrows in response. He was frustrated with how nonchalant Victor was being about this whole situation, but he supposed he couldn’t be too angry. The crowds Victor had brought to Hasetsu were insignificant in comparison to the flock of people that swarmed it at every occasion. He supposed being a national star in Russia that he was used to all this fame. However, Yuuri could never imagine getting used to the constant flashes of bright cameras or stream questions from demanding interviewers. He was very content with his boring, small town life.  

"You don't think telling the media that you left the skating world will be a big deal?" Yuuri asked with a grimace. It was bad enough that he had to lie about being his soulmate in the first place, but not telling the media Victor decided to be his coach would surely be a bad idea in the long run. Yuuri knew he would be painted as the one that took skating sweetheart Victor Nikiforov away from the skating world, soulmate or not. It was only a matter of time.

"I'm not leaving," he defended, crossing his arms. "I'm taking on a new role. People do that all the time."

"I doubt the media will take that lightly," Yuuri pointed out with a frown. From experience, he knew the media was keen on conjuring fantastical stories, stretched from the tiniest piece of truth. After his last disaster at the Grand Prix Finals, he had read hundreds of made-up stories regarding his career. One had even gone as far as to insinuate that he had some sort of rare cancer and needed to go home so quickly for an operations. He wouldn't be surprised if there was some article saying Victor's supposed retirement was because of some bone accident or having an illegitimate child somewhere.

"I'll just say I'm on vacation," he suggested lightheartedly. “That’s what I’ve been doing and it seems to be working.”

Yuuri’s eyes turned downcast. "Is that all this is? Vacation?" Yuuri asked quietly, not sure if Victor had heard him. He knew it was just an offhanded comment, but it still hurt all the same.

Honestly, he had been doubtful that Victor was taking the entire situation seriously. He wondered if Victor would eventually announce that he was competing this season. Deep down, he knew it wasn't true. He knew Victor was adamant about meeting his soulmate, but Yuuri was worried he didn't quite meet his overzealous expectations. It was only a matter of time before the soulmate craze had worn off and Victor would leave Yuuri. Soulmates didn't always end up together, and Yuuri knew Victor deserved better than him. It was only time before Yuuri would mess up and Victor would leave.

"Yuuri. You know that's not true," Victor assured him with a soft smile. Yuuri’s eyes watched as Victor’s hand grazed over the zeroes on his soulmate watch.

If Yuuri was being truthful, Victor's kind words did little to assure his doubts. Every day, he would wonder if Victor would leave; or rather, when he would leave? Yuuri had admittedly rejected his advances to be his soulmate. There was no reason for Victor to stay. Victor claimed he wanted to train him to be a better skater, but Yuuri was making little progress. It wouldn't be long until Victor got agitated and went back to Russia.

"Training you was the best decision of my life," he admitted, bringing his soulmate watch to his chest out of habit. From the position, Yuuri could see the bright red zeroes almost mocking him.

"How can you say that?”

“You know why,” Victor said, his eyes locked on Yuuri’s soulmate watch.

“I still can't land a quadruple salchow and it's been weeks," he murmured, directing the conversation away from their personal relationship. Honestly, he was a bit frustrated with the little progress he had made. It wasn't that Victor was a bad coach - sure, he lacked a bit of experience - but he knew how to personally coach Yuuri. He would easily tell Yuuri of his faults bluntly, even go as far as to correct his positions hands on. And yet, nothing seemed to help Yuuri; he still couldn't perform to Victor's standards. He waved his hand in the air.

"That's alright. It's a hard jump."

"You haven't even started choreographing my routines," Yuuri reminded him, almost bitterly. He had wondered if Victor even had any plans to choreograph his routines. He had asked him once before but he said something along the lines of lacking inspiration before quickly changing the topic.

"I can't do that until you pick a theme. You know that."

"Well my coach usually picks my theme," Yuuri reminded him. Last year, his previous coach had chosen 'hope' as his theme. It was cliche, sure, but it was better than any of Yuuri's ideas. He wasn't the most creative of people and he was happy to take any suggestion he could get.

"Ah, I see." Victor tapped his finger to his lips. "But I'm not your usual coach, am I? So let's say hypothetically you would choose the theme, what would you want?"

Yuuri blinked once. He knew Victor was quite unorthodox in his coaching but this was an entirely new concept for Yuuri. He hadn't even thought about a potential theme. He supposed he could always choose something typical.

"Do I have to decide now?"

"Not necessarily. But I can't exactly make a perfect routine without a theme."

"I'm sure whatever you choreograph will be great," Yuuri complemented genuinely. Truly, he had long been a fan of Victor's routines. Even back in his Junior days, Victor always crafted his routines with the grace and elegance to emphasize his strengths as a skater. Not many skaters choreographed their own routines, and were able to pull it off as well as Victor did.

"I know you've choreographed all of your routines, and they're all amazing," Yuuri confessed with a light blush on his cheeks.

Victor smiled at his compliments. "You flatter me."

"They are!" Yuuri defended. “Why do you think I agreed for you to be my coach?”

"Yes, that’s true, but my routines always had a theme. Redemption, rebirth, longing," he said, his eyes unwavering.

"If you were skating this year, what would your theme be?" Yuuri asked, cocking his head to the right.

He chuckled, grabbing both of their blade guards from the banister. He leaned on the boards slightly for support, covering his gold blades with his plastic blue guards. "You sound like a reporter," he pointed out.

"I'm just curious," Yuuri defended with a huff.

"Love," Victor said without hesitation. He looked up from fixing his blade guards, his eyes locking onto Yuuri’s.

Yuuri exhaled. "Victor..."

"There's so many different types of love. I had been thinking about it for a while. I never had love as my theme." He sighed, carding a hand through his platinum blond hair. "It must seem so cliche."

"No. Not at all. I like it," Yuuri confessed smiling softly. Truth be told, he had thought about having ‘love’ as his theme for his last competitive season.

"I do too," he responded with a smile. He held out Yuuri’s blade guards, offering the red and silver plastic with an outstretched hand. "I had a few ideas about routines last season but I was stuck between two different versions. I guess it doesn't matter now."

"I guess not," Yuuri agreed, accepting the blade guard. Their hands brushed together slightly, but he thought almost nothing intimate of the gesture. Instead, he slowly covered his silver blades, musing about whether he would have to sharpen his skate yet or not.

Victor frowned, his eyes following Yuuri as he exited the rink.

"Are you really still skating with those skates?." Yuuri scowled. He situated himself at one of the wooden benches near the entrance of the rink and quickly unlaced one of the skates, desperate not to be critiqued by Victor anymore.

"What's wrong with them?" he challenged, shuffling off his left skate. He placed the skate on the bench, glaring at its imperfections. He knew they weren’t in the best of conditions - especially for professional standards - but they were still well-made skates.

"Well first off, the laces are all frayed," Victor commented, gesturing to his skates. He lifted the skate carelessly, showing off all of its flaws to Yuuri. "Not to mention that the heels have taken a large amount of damage and your toe is about to come out of your left skate."

"Sorry we can't all have golden plated skates," he chuckled, lightheartedly mocking his ostentatious nature. As showy as most ice skaters were, Victor was the only relevant competitive skater with golden blades that he considered unique to the World Champion. Apparently, he had picked out golden blades since he was a child, and somehow stuck with the gaudy shade into his professional career. He decided that the gold skates only encouraged him to win as if it were some sort of good luck charm. Plus, he claimed silver skates would take away from his platinum hair and decided he should wear gold.

"That's true." Victor smirked, his lips curling into a smile. "You know I melted down all my gold medals and made these."

Yuuri rolled his eyes. "You're being ridiculous. I saw your medals in one of your boxes."

"You caught me," Victor admitted, holding his hands up in a mock surrender. Yuuri watched as Victor’s own pair of skates, a bit jealous of how beautiful the skates truly were. Victor’s skates were a handmade pair that could put any other professional’s to shame, even with such a flashy blade. "But seriously. You need new skates."

"Ah, that's nice, but I don't think we have time to break them in.”

"We have at least six months until your first competition," Victor explained. "That's more than enough time."

Yuuri looked down at his lap. He didn't particularly want to admit that he didn't want to change his skates. They were old and beaten up as Victor had pointed out, but they were the first skates he ever received as a professional skater and they held some sentimental value. Besides, he didn't really need new skates if he was planning on retiring after this season.

"I can't afford them."

"Money isn't an issue for me," Victor scoffed as if a new pair of skates was equivalent to the price of a cup of coffee. Yuuri knew money wasn’t an issue for his coach, not when he was the five time world champion with sponsorship with various big-name brands.

Yuuri shook his head, strands of his black hair falling into his face. He didn't particularly care if Victor was well-out monetarily or not; he simply couldn't accept a gift that expensive, even if he did need them. "Victor, I can't have you pay for them."

"Think of it as a gift. A thank you for letting me stay with you."

"I can't agree to that," Yuuri protested. New skates would need to be custom tailored for each foot and would probably cost at least a thousand dollars. He couldn't make Victor pay that much for him, coach or not.

"How about you make me katsudon tonight and we'll call it even."

"Victor..." he whined at the unfair offer. He hardly thought katsudon - albeit it was a food Yuuri often described as heavenly - was a fair trade for a new pair of skates.  

"Katsudon for a week?" Victor suggested, his lips quirked into a smile.

Yuuri crossed his arms over his chest. "That's not exactly fair."

"I don't play fair. I play to win," Victor said with a smirk.

Yuuri gathered his belongings, shoving his skates into his bag before Victor could protest further. Honestly, he didn’t want to have this conversation after a long day training. “Fine. We’ll talk about this later. Let’s just go home.”

"Very well,” Victor agreed, accepting his win. He collected his belongings into his large duffel bag before following Yuuri out of the Ice Castle. It was already dark outside; the faint light of the street lamps illuminating the two as they walked down the steps of the ice rink.  

"I didn't think it would still be so busy," Yuuri pointed out, noticing the small crowd that had gathered outside the ice rink. He supposed Victor's fame had attribute to this sudden influx of people to his provincial town. Even after a month, the fervor of fans had yet to diminish completely.

“This is busy?” Victor asked, furrowing his eyebrows. Yuuri knew he was probably used to larger crowds - growing up as Russia’s national icon in a large city probably accounted for this. He supposed he couldn’t blame Victor for not realizing the difference.  

"I guess," Yuuri mused. He hadn't even noticed how crowded the city had become in his absence. Hasetsu wasn't the largest of cities and certainly not a tourist destination. And yet, the streets of Hasetsu's downtown core were bustling with people, rushing around trying to catch a glimpse of the international star. "There’s more people than usual. And it's not quite time for cherry blossoms and it's not warm enough for the ocean.”

"Ah, I can't wait for it to be warm enough to go down to the beach," Victor said almost wistfully. His blue eyes drifted to the lapping waves, drinking in the calming ebb and flow of the water. He paused before adding, “you know, the ocean reminds me a lot of home."

"Your home?" Yuuri asked innocently. Until now, Victor has yet to speak about Russia aside from a few insignificant comments. His life back in Russia had remained all but a mystery to Yuuri.

"Back in St. Petersburg." Victor sighed, his breath creating perfect swirls in the crisp air. "There's no water but there's a lot of seagulls."

Yuuri looked at Victor, his brown eyes meeting his blue. "Don't you miss Russia?"

Victor shrugged his shoulders casually. "Not much there for me to miss."

"Don't you have a family?" Yuuri asked innocently. As far as Yuuri could tell, Victor tended to avoid the topic of his family. Within the one month of being together, he had only talked about his family twice. The first was when Yuuri offhandedly made a comment about being embarrassed by his family only to have Victor say how different it was from his home life. The second was when an interviewer had asked about if his parents knew why he was in Japan. Both times, he had been quick to change the topic.  

"Yeah, but I don't talk to them much. They're always...busy," he said, his voice trailing off. He adverted Yuuri’s gaze and focused on his long strides instead. "My only family is Makkachin."

"Ah..." Yuuri couldn't imagine having a family that like Victor's. One that was never around and never a part of his life. He knew from past interviews that Victor didn’t have the best relationship with his family. His parents had both worked hard to pay for his skating and never came to support him during competitions.

Victor’s family life was so different from Yuuri's family. His family was so loud and obtrusive at every opportune moment. Even his friends were always an ever excessive presence in his life. Despite their pushy behavior, he was sincerely grateful that they were always present and supported his decisions.

"It's not really that important."

Yuuri hummed in agreement, not really wanting to be pushy about the subject. It obviously made Victor uncomfortable so Yuuri decided not to press further.

The two amicably walked in silence, both staring at the moon’s reflection over the ocean waves. Yuuri wondered what Victor was thinking of. He wondered if Victor had any plans to move back to Russia, even after Yuuri inevitably retired.

"Victor!" a distinct voice called out.

“Mm?" Victor asked, turning around towards the source of the voice.

From what Yuuri could gather, the voice was coming from the young boy rushing through the small crowd. He was traditionally beautiful, much like Victor, with a round face and button nose. It was obvious from the golden blond hair peeking out from under his blue hoodie that he was a foreigner. Yuuri assumed he was another fan or reporter wanting answers.

“Oy, Victor!” the deep voice repeated, pushing his way towards the pair.

Yuuri sighed. He was getting rather tired of obsessive fans who had tracked Victor from his social media accounts. He knew his fans were a bit passionate (albeit he wasn’t much better seeing his collection of posters hung on his walls) but it seemed almost excessive to follow him based on his social media. Yuuri knew he would one day need to take Victor's phone and destroy it or at least prevent him from ever posting on social media again.

After seeing the responses from Victor’s fans, Yuuri was glad he wasn’t big on social media platforms. He posted a few times of instagram - mostly impersonal photos of his ice skates or some sponsorship - and posted a few updates about his competitions on his twitter. Despite his friends’ fervor, he was never one to put himself out on the internet. He heard what they said about him: the “fatty”, the “fag”, the “jap”. He didn’t need that negativity in his life.  

Plus, he didn’t need young fans stalking him everywhere he went like Victor did.

“Ah, Yura, so great to see you," Victor said, addressing the young boy. He flashed a smile to him that Yuuri could tell was a bit too forced. His natural smiles were softer, his eyes crinkling slightly as he did so. This smile was far different; his eyes weren’t shining and his cheeks failed to create small dimples that came from his typical smiles. No, this was the smile of the Five Time World Champion who had the world in the palm of his hand.

“Don’t call me that," the other replied in a foreign language that Yuuri could only assume was Russian.

“But it's such a cute name," Victor replied in English, patting the top of his head affectionately.

"No!” the boy growled, swatting his hand away. He patted his hair, fixing the strands that Victor rustled before hiding the rest underneath his hood. “It’s Yuri now."

"Victor, who is this?" Yuuri finally asked shyly.

"Ah, this is my old rink mate and Junior Champion. Say hi, Yura."

"It's Yuri to you," he replied with a scowl.

"We can't have two Yuris," Victor pointed out with a hum. "That'll get confusing. I guess you'll be Yuri-o."

"Why not change his name?" Yuri asked with a frown. To emphasize his point, he stomped his foot and gestured to Yuuri, much akin to a child.

"Because he's older," he countered smoothly.

"Oh, um, hi Yurio," Yuuri greeted awkwardly. He politely held out his hand for the blond to take, not sure if that was appropriate or not.

He scowled, slapping Yuuri's hand away as if he were offended by his polite gesture. "Shut up, I'm not talking to you. I'm here for Victor."

"Of course you are," Yuuri muttered, almost bitterly. It seemed that was all people were here for. He had no reason to talk to Yuuri anyways. No one really did other than to get information about Victor.

“What are you doing here?” he asked, his focus turning back to Victor.

“Did Yakov send you?” Victor asked, actively avoiding Yuri's question.

“Answer my question," Yurio demanded, focusing on the conversation at hand.

“I’m on vacation," he said, gesturing to the city around them."Haven’t you been keeping up with the news?”

“On vacation? In nowhere? With that _loser_?” he spat, pointing to Yuuri.

Yuuri frowned. Sure Yuuri had a more than a few centimeters on him, but he was rather offended by his bold comments. He wonder how much he truly knew of the situation.

“Don’t talk about my friend that way," Victor defended, anger lacing his voice.

Yuuri smiled slightly, pleased that Victor had defended him against the young boy's harsh words. Victor had always been protective of Yuuri, especially with the constant stream of reporters. He would often shield them from any suspicions, desperate to have Yuuri out of the media’s attention as much as possible. Yuuri was truly grateful for that.

“Whatever. Your vacation ends now," he commanded, standing a little straighter as if to intimidate Victor.

Victor raised an eyebrow, almost amused with Yurio's bold tone. Yuuri could tell he wasn't going to be intimidated by someone so young. “Oh really?” he asked, raising an eyebrow skeptically. “Says who?”

“Says me," he answered. He crossed his arms over his chest, a bit annoyed with Victor's nonchalance about the next upcoming skating season. "You said you’d give me your routine. That love one. If you're not using it, I will."

“I can’t give it to you," Victor admitted with a smirk, as if to taunt Yurio.

Yurio's green eyes widened. “Any why not?"

“Because I’m giving it to him," Victor explained smoothly pointing at Yuuri.

Yuuri’s eyes widened. He knew they had yet to fully discuss routines - they had been focusing on basic training for the time being - and yet Victor had already internally decided this routine would be for him. Not to mention this routine had the theme ‘love’.

“What!?" He scowled. He narrowed his eyes, glaring daggers at Yuuri in an almost predatory manner. “Why!?"

“Because I’m his coach," he replied. He tossed his head back as if this declaration wasn’t a large scandal in the skating community.

“What!? Since when?" he asked, his hands onat his hips.

"Since I saw his performance at the Grand Prix Finals," he admitted honestly.

Yuuri frowned slightly. He couldn't believe Victor was saying all of this so casually, especially to someone who could potentially tell the press. He thought Victor had respected his desire to keep their relationship a secret. He wondered how much longer they had until the world found out prematurely.

"That disaster? Why waste your time?” Yurio scoffed, unnot affected by Victor’s comment. “Why not train someone who can actually beat your records."

Victor smirked. "Oh, but I already am."

"You son of a bitch," he growled.

"Ah, is this how you plan to convince me to move back to Russia?" he asked, raising an eyebrow. "By insulting me?"

"Yes, you bastard. Now, let's go back to Russia," Yurio demanded, tugging at the sleeve of his red track jacket.

Yuuri's brown eyes widened at his proposition. _Back to Russia?_ he had thought, repeating the words in his head. He didn’t want to lose Victor, not after all the progress they had made. He had thought he meant something to Victor, even if it was something as superficial as being his soulmate. And now, some teenager was going to take Victor away.

"What's the hurry?" Victor asked in a sickly innocent voice. "This is my vacation, after all. And now that you’re here, you may as well enjoy it as well. Come back to the hot spring for a bit."

"Unlike you, I can't be taking vacations," he spat, scowling at Yuuri.

“Well you should,” Victor said in a matter-of-fact tone. “You look like you need some time to unwind.”

“I've only got so much time until the first competition. Someone has to win gold and your precious friend over here isn't going to, with or without your help."

"Well I am staying here," he answered stubbornly.

Yuuri silently let out a breath he didn't realize he was holding in. He was thankful Victor had no thoughts about leaving. He didn't want to admit it, but he was slightly happy those soulmate watches had brought them together. Even if it had only been a few weeks, he had grown accustomed to his little quirks. The way he tilted his head back when he laughed or the way he tapped his fingers when he was becoming impatient or the way he would shout 'vkusno' after eating something delicious were all things Yuuri began to find endearing. He couldn't imagine life without Victor.

"Yakov said you were going to be difficult," Yurio commented under his breath.

"I'm stubborn, what can I say? Reminds me of someone else I know.”

"You promised me a routine if I won the gold and I did. This isn't exactly fair," he exclaimed. He waved his hands in the air animatedly as if to emphasize his point.

Victor shrugged his shoulders once. "Life isn't fair."

Yurio snorted as if to laugh at Victor’s rather dark comment. "Fine, if we're not playing fair, let's make it interesting. Let's have a competition."

"A competition?" Victor asked, raising a thin eyebrow, a bit intrigued by the proposition.

Yuuri sucked in a breath of air. He could feel his chest clenching slightly, his heart beating faster. He tried to speak, wanted to tell Victor that this could only end poorly, but his words were caught in his tight throat, unable to come out.

"You're apparently coach now so make us both routines and we'll compete to see who is better," Yurio proposed.

A smile tugged at Victor’s lips. “I’m listening.”

“Wait-what?” Yuuri asked, his brown eyes wide. He couldn’t believe Victor had even been interested in such a childish suggestion.  Yuuri knew he had an addiction for competition and, from the look on his face, but this was simply ridiculous.

He couldn't compete against the supposed Junior World Champion. Yuuri could barely beat his own personal record let alone the record of the newly announced Junior World Champion. He had seen Yurio’s performances live: it was a rather elegant routine, albeit without any quads. The flawless showing reminded him of Victor’s junior debut.

“Sounds fun!” Victor exclaimed, a smile growing on his lips.

"Wait I don't agree-" Yuuri started but was immediately cut off.

"Winner gets you as a coach," Yurio added, smirking confidently.  

Yuuri looked over at Victor, his eyes desperately pleading for him to ignore his rink mate's request. His skating wasn’t anything special, especially technically. He could barely land any quads, even after a month of Victor’s training regiment. He knew he would surely lose in this competition.

As selfish as it was, he didn’t want to lose Victor.

"Mm interesting," he began, his expression unreadable. He tapped his pointer finger to his lips, as if he were weighing his options accordingly. "Okay, I'll play along."

"Victor!" Yuuri protested, but was easily ignored.

Yurio smirked, pleased with the results. "Excellent. We start at dawn."

 

_To be continued...?_

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you all for reading! I hope you enjoyed this update!  
> If you would like to chat, feel free to hit me up on jesse-rae-on-ice.tumblr.com. Also, if you want to make fanart, that would be really awesome!! Please tag me in it so I can see it!  
> Again, a huge shout out to @amaranthinecastiel and @adorkable-phangirl! Thank you both so much!!  
> Once more, I wanted to thank everyone for your continued support reading and leaving comments/kudos. Your kind words fuel my writing and I am so grateful!  
> See you all (hopefully) soon!!


	5. Chapter 5

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I am so sorry for the delay! I went on vacation and didn't have any time to write!  
> But now I'm back and ready for more chapters!!  
> This chapter was beta-ed by @adorkable-phangirl on tumblr so please check them out! They are amazing!!  
> Also, I'd like to say that somehow this story reached over 200 comments! I am amazed and I would like to thank every single one of you for your continued support!!!  
> Okay, now on with the chapter!
> 
> Warnings: references to homophobia, transphobia, xenophobia, and mild weight shaming.

Yurio was serious when he had wanted to start at dawn.

Victor, personally, had no concerns about waking up before the sun to train; he had grown accustomed to this lifestyle at the age of 10. He had learned to appreciate the sloping sun as it streamed into the rink, the gentle caress of the wind as it tickled his face, and the sound of birds singing their charming tunes. It was almost calming to wake up before the rest of the world.

However, this didn’t seem to hold true for Yuuri. Yuuri had looked down right exhausted - his eyes had dark circles around them and his face was rather flushed. By the end of the warm-up, Victor could tell he was tired after landing just one quadruple salchow. He supposed Yakaov would lecture him, yell at him until his throat was raw. But Victor wasn’t about to scold Yuuri, not after all the progress he made.

“Excellent work, Yuuri,” Victor complimented after Yuuri landed his triple axel. He knew Yuuri had made extensive strides since he had started coaching him. Yuuri, once a shy skater now boasted his jumps with confidence. Yet even with all of their progress, he could tell that his soulmate didn’t feel the same way as he did.

“Mmm,” he hummed, panting slightly.

Victor frowned at his lukewarm reaction. He was hoping having Yurio compete against him would boost his confidence, but it all but seemed to have the opposite effect.

“You can finally land a quadruple salchow. You should be proud.”

“I am,” Yuuri argued defensively with a pout. He had skated towards the edge of the rink, using the boards to support his rather tired body.

“It’s a hard jump,” Victor pointed out truthfully.

Yurio snorted. “Not that hard.“

Victor rolled his eyes, not appreciating his negative comments. He silently wondered if his comments were nothing more than a manifestation of his jealousy.

“You’re making great progress,” he assured him with a flashing smile.

“Thanks,” he said, the corners of his lips curling into a small smile.

“You’re tired,” Victor said bluntly, breaking the tense silence. “How about you workout with Yuuko for a bit while I work on Yurio’s routine?”

“He surely needs it,” Yurio muttered under his breath.

Victor chose to ignore his comment. He knew what people had said about Yuuri. Judging from the comments on his recent instagram posts, people weren’t pleased with Victor’s new friend. They had called him overweight, even going as far as to make up the nickname 'piggy’.

Victor consciously ignored those comments. Sure, it was true that he wasn’t built to be a figure skater with his rather large frame and thick thighs, but that simply meant he would have to train differently. Besides, Victor thought he was beautiful, and that’s all what really mattered.

“Be back here by noon. I can show you your program then,” he suggested, offering Yuuri a smile.

Yuuri nodded, grabbing his guards from the boards. He placed the plastic guards over his silver blades, offering Victor a small smile before exiting the rink.

He clapped his hands together. “Alright Yurio,” Victor said, turning towards the blond skater.

“Ready to finally stop focusing on _him_ and show me my routine?” he asked, a hand on his hip.

Victor smirked, picking up the small black remote that rested on the boards. He ignored his rude remarks, and skated to the middle of the rink. He took his first position, ready to show Yurio the routine he had been perfecting. Victor pressed the small play button on the remote. From the speakers in the small ice rink, the soft notes of a familiar love song flowed smoothly.

The routine began with his head bowed, his hands raising towards the ceiling. Unconditional love, wasn’t it? When he created this routine, he thought nothing but his soulmate. That’s what soulmate were, weren’t they? An embodiment of unconditional love?

The music began to swell, his body simply running through the motions. He had thought he would know unconditional love when meeting Yuuri. But what he felt then wasn’t unconditional love, not really.

He truly did love Yuuri, but not the way that he had originally thought. He had loved the way he became flustered whenever Victor’s hands accidentally brushed against his. He had loved the way he took to the ice, skating gracefully in his fluid step sequences. He had even loved how he smiled, his eyes crinkling towards the edges. He supposed his ridiculous love at first sight notion was not nearly the unconditional love he had learned in his short time with Yuuri.

The last notes began to fill the empty rink. And just as quickly as they flowed, they quickly fluttered away. Victor finished the routine with his hands clasped together towards the ceiling, his mind thinking of nothing but Yuuri.

“What did you think?” he asked, panting slightly.

Victor turned towards Yurio who was casually leaning against the boards. His eyes were narrowed, as if he were calculating his response.

“I hate it,” he admitted bluntly.

Victor sighed. He knew Yurio wasn’t convinced in the slightest, and he couldn’t exactly blame him. When he created this routine, it carried a different meaning. The love routine he had previously created was nothing more than a plea to his soulmate. Now, he the feeling of unconditional love carried a new meaning.

“This isn’t the piece you were working on back home,” he continued.

“This is a different arrangement,” Victor noted, skating back towards the boards.  He placed the remote down on the banister, grabbing his water bottle as he did so.

Yurio scowled. “I don’t want this.”

“I thought you wanted me to choreograph for you,” Victor said and innocently sipped his water bottle.

“I did!”

“Isn’t this why you traveled so far?” he asked in a sickeningly sweet tone, as if to further enrage the young skater.

“Yeah, but this doesn’t suit me at all!” Yurio exclaimed, his hands waving erratically in the air.

Victor supposed he was right about that aspect. A piece about unconditional love was hardly suited for someone who preferred heavy metal arrangements.

“You have to do the opposite of what people expect or they’ll get bored. People are expecting you to do something loud and brash. Something softer like this would be more surprising,” Victor pointed out. Victor himself had prided his career on being able to surprise the audience. Even the judges weren’t able to predict what he would do next. He supposed it was the one attribute that made him special, in some respects.

“Who cares about surprising people? This is boring! I don’t want this as my debut!” he declared. He dug his toe pick into the ice, grinding some of the ice below his feet into slush.

“It’s not boring!” Victor defended with a huff, a bit offended by his comment. His choreography was far from boring, even if the piece was slow. Every step sequence and jump was carefully pieced together to match the music. No other choreographer could even dream of creating the sequences that he had. Yurio should be practically begging to perform to something so special, not critiquing it.

“It is,” he argued.

“Can’t you see the story I’m crafting?” Victor asked, a hand resting on his hip.

“No,” Yurio argued. He crossed his arms, locking them below his chest. “All I see is a slow boring piece that shows that Victor Nikiforov truly lost his inspiration.“

Victor rolled his eyes. He had lost his inspiration, hadn’t he? He had been told that multiple times and was beginning to believe those words. He supposed his routine for the previous season was rather lackluster as well. A longing aria about his soulmate was rather typical and all but emphasized his dying career.

He shook his head, strands of his long blond hair falling into his face. "Not to mention you’re truly a terrible choreographer."

Victor exhaled. He wondered if he was this difficult to work with under Yakov. "How about you explain the choreography instead of critiquing my work?"

"Fine, it’s about two people coming together and realizing they’re in love and I’ve happily ever after like some Disney movie.” He placed a hand on his hip.“Happy?"

"Not exactly. It’s about unconditional love.” Victor tapped a finger to his lip, a bit unsatisfied with his answer. He supposed that Yurio was too young and naive to understand the difference. He supposed he was as well.

Yurio furrows his neat eyebrows, confused with Victor’s cryptic answer. “Isn’t that what I said?"

"No,” Victor said firmly. He leaned his weight on the banister, careful to balance himself before brushing away the slush that collected on his blades. “Unconditional love is much more innocent."

Yurio frowned. "Why didn’t you just say that?"

"I want you to come up with your own explanation,” he said, looking up from his skates. He didn’t want Yurio to copy his performance, especially when it came to expressing an emotion. Plenty of people constantly tried to copy him, but failed to understand and make his routines into their own.  He had seen amateurs and even professional attempt his routines, yet none could convey the same emotions as he had. They had all tried too hard to copy his unique style, failing to change the routine to become their own.

Yuuri, however, had failed to merely copy his routine. He had taken his aria and crafted his own story. His body had told a new story; one with an entirely new meaning.

“Enough with your poetry,” Yurio said, stopping Victor’s thoughts. “Just tell me what unconditional love is to you."

"It’s a feeling,” he lied tossing his head back with a laugh. He had hoped his explanation would satiate the young skater.

To be honest, he didn’t know what unconditional love was. He thought meeting his soulmate would be the epitome of unconditional love but he wasn’t sure anymore. Sure he had loved Yuuri, but he wasn’t sure if he truly loved Yuuri or loved the idea of his soulmate. After spending an entire months with Yuuri, he learned that his previous feelings were nothing more than lustful advances.

His true love, his so-called unconditional love, was much more pure. The love he felt when Yuuri would sleep through his alarm clock or furrow his eyebrows when deep in thought was different. Everything he had learned about Yuuri had made him fall in love with him all over again.

“You know I could never feel that,” he stated simply, his breath creating swirls in the cool air.

Victor watched as he cast his eyes downward towards his soulmate watch and sighed. He knew fully well about Yurio’s predicament. As it turned out, Yurio was one of the unlucky - or lucky, depending how one looked at the situation - people who didn’t have a soulmate. His watch remained dark, the traditional red numbers never appearing. At the age of 15, it was unlikely it would turn on at all.

“That’s not true. Just because you don’t have a soulmate doesn’t mean you can’t feel love,” Victor explained, offering his friend a sad smile. He knew how difficult it was to feel unwanted, unappreciated, unloved.

He was only thirteen when it happened. He had thought he found love in the embrace of another, but his love for his young friend had only severed the bond between him and his family. After his failed relationship, Victor had begun to shut out the world, finding solace in the comfort of the ice. He began to find refuge in his successful skating career, but that love was only artificial.

He had always thought meeting his soulmate would prove he was truly loved by someone else but somehow he had ruined his own destiny as well. What he had previously thought to be unconditional affection was nothing more than lustful desire.

Yurio snorted bitterly. “Easy for you to say. You’ve found your soulmate."

"I-” he began, the words caught in his dry mouth.

"Don’t play games with me,“ he growled.

"W-what?” Victor asked, his voice shaking. He had thought he had hidden this information, had left fans to speculate whether he had truly met his soulmate or not. He had begun to wear longer sleeves, covering his watch at any given opportunity. He couldn’t jeopardize Yuuri’s career, not when the time was against them.

“I know. I know he’s your soulmate.”

“My clock hasn’t even finished-”

Victor didn’t have time to finish the sentence before Yurio jerked forward, grabbing Victor’s left wrist. He held the black watch up to his green eyes, inspected the small red zeroes.

“What are you doing?” Victor asked, pulling his arm away fiercely. He pulled his sleeve down further, desperate to hide his watch from Yurio’s prying gaze. He was never one to be particularly shy about his soulmate or his soulmate watch - everyone seemingly knew the date and time his watch would go off - but the situation was complicated now. With a soulmate who wasn’t interested in a romantic relationship, his watch became nothing but a grim reminder. He wanted nothing more than to rip the offending object off.

“He’s your soulmate,” he said, his voice no louder than a whisper.

“Yurio, that was extremely rude-”

“Yuuri is your soulmate,” he repeated, a bit louder.

“And so what if he is?” he asked, defensively. Instinctively, he rolled the sleeve on his blue jacket down further, desperate to hide his watch once more.

Yurio smirked, finding the exchange all but laughable. “I knew it! Who would think that world champion Victor Nikiforov’s soulmate is that loser. I always knew you would end up with a guy, but him of all people! This is hilarious!”

Victor grabbed his blade guards, quickly placing the plastic over his blades. He wasn’t about to have this conversation, not with a fifteen year old delinquent who didn’t even have a soulmate. “I’m not commenting on this.”

“You don’t need to. This is wonderful!” he said, stifling a laugh.

“You can’t tell anyone,” he began, his eyes narrowed slightly. He knew Yurio would find this situation nothing more than a foolish game, but this was far too important to leak to the public.

“And why not?’ he asked, arching his eyebrows. “I’m sure Mila and the others will get a laugh out of this. I wonder what Yakov will think…”

“Yura,” he whispered, purposefully using his given name.

Yurio's smile fell, his playful demeanor immediately turning sour. Victor knew he had gotten his message across.

“They’re going to find out,” Yurio muttered under his breath, sourly.

Victor frowned at his comment. He knew he couldn’t keep secrets from the press, no matter how trivial. He simply wasn’t one to have a personal life apart from his professional life. Even now, he had little restraint when posting pictures of him in Japan, even if it seemed more like a vacation than anything else. He internally cursed his social media addiction.

“They always find out,” he added, the words lingering in the crisp air.

“They’ll be happy to know we’re not soulmates,” Victor admitted with a wave of his hand. He wasn’t exactly lying, not really. Yuuri had, after all, rejected him from being his soulmate, romantically or platonically. Yuuri was merely his student and he was happy to announce that to the public.

“You can’t keep lying forever.”

He bent down, his eyes leveled with Yurio’s as if to intimidate him. "Watch me."

Yurio eyes jumped to the wall, averting them from Victor’s harsh gaze. "They’ll find out sooner or later. May as well tell them now."

“My hands are tied,” Victor decided hopelessly. He sighed, carding his hands through his silvery hair. “I can’t lie because they’ll find out and I can’t tell the truth because it will ruin Yuuri.”

"Then leave and train me,” Yurio suggested.

He exhaled miserably, taking Yurio’s proposition into consideration. He knew it was an option. He could return to Russia, return to skating, and live his life as he did for the past twenty years. Sure, he would be miserable, but he wouldn’t be putting Yuuri’s career at risk.

“I can’t do that either.”

“You know what they did to Sasha,” Yurio reminded him, standing a bit straighter.

Victor swallowed, his chest beginning to tighten. He knew exactly what had happened to Sasha.

It was the beginning of Victor’s senior debut when everything had happened. Sasha Ivanov was one of his senior skaters who trained with him under Yakov. He was one of the best skaters, despite being only twenty. The entire world had loved him, had called him Russia’s National Hero.

But Victor admired him for other reasons. Sure his skating was phenomenal, but Sasha never conformed to traditional gender norms, always against conventional ideas. He had long brown hair which all but accentuated his rather flamboyant outfits. He was truly his inspiration.

It was a rare sunny day in Russia when Victor read the news. A broken skate, as the media had called it; yet Victor knew the truth. Someone had purposefully hurt Sasha.

At the time, Victor didn’t understand why someone would do this. As the years passed, he began to learn: they didn’t like his soulmate.

Victor couldn’t understand what was so wrong about his soulmate. He was a young man with curly brown hair and an angular face. He came to every competition, and had even supported Sasha during private practice sessions.

Victor supposed one picture of them holding hands led to another before he revealed their relationship on international television. Not more than twenty four hours had passed before Sasha was in the news again. This time, they announced he would never skate again.

“They’ll realize and they’ll come after you,” Yurio reminded Victor.

Victor crossed his arms over his chest, trying to keep himself calm. He could feel his heartbeat racing, heat pooling in his chest. “We have a private relationship,” he replied smoothly.

“You’re not one for privacy. You have press and fans eager to do whatever it takes to figure out the truth. It doesn’t help that you even posted pictures together on Instagram.”

“Can friends not post pictures of each other?” he asked defensively, trying to divert the conversation.

“Friends can, but not soulmates.”

“We’re platonic soulmates,” he argued. He had heard of cases in which soulmates were purely platonic. Sure, it was a rather rare situation, but not impossible. Just because two people were destined to be together did not simply mean they were destined to be in a romantic relationship. Victor wondered if he and Yuuri would ever be in a romantic relationship anyways.

“Doesn’t matter what you call it. Platonic, professional, you’re still soulmates,” Yurio said with a scowl.

“Don’t say that. I’m his coach. He wants to focus on his career. I can’t argue with that.”

Yurio’s lips pursed together. “So you agreed?”

“Of course!” Victor admitted, as if it were the most obvious thing in the world. Honestly, he would have agreed to anything Yuuri had told him. That’s what soulmates do.

The young blond snorted. “I’m surprised you can think of anyone but yourself.”

Victor rolled his blue eyes. Sure he was rather selfish at times - Yakov had told him that multiple times - but that was before he met Yuuri. To be honest, he thought of nothing but helping Yuuri. He had all but sacrificed his career, his home, and his reputation to come be with Yuuri, coach or not. If that wasn’t the epitome of selflessness, Victor didn’t know what was.

“I’m capable of love, unlike some people,” he jeered, rolling his blue eyes.

“You’re also capable of throwing away twenty years of skating in the middle your last season for him.”

Victor scowled. He wasn’t simply ‘throwing away his career’ as many had so eloquently phrased it. He was simply moving on to a new frontier. Even if he hadn’t met Yuuri, it would be a matter of time before an injury that would permanently prevent him from skating again. He was twenty seven after all. People retired from figure skating much younger than that.

Besides, he couldn’t understand why everyone was obsessed with his skating career anyways. If he wanted to retire, then so be it. It was his decision to make, not anyone else’s.

“I’ve been thinking about retiring. Surely Yakov’s told you,” he reminded him. He remembered telling Yakov of his retirement plans. He hadn’t taken lightly to them at all, claiming that he was being too rash about his soulmate.

Yurio scoffed. “Yakov also told us a lot of other things about you.”

“Oh really?” Victor asked, raising an eyebrow. He was rather curious what Yakov had told him. His coach was never one to speak praises about him. He constantly scolded him for his supposedly aloof attitude and rather unprofessional behavior. He would say how it’s unbecoming of a world renowned skater to live with uch selfish whims. And yet, Victor didn’t seem to care; it seemed as though Yakov’s words only fueled his rebellion

“Yes, like how you’re impatient. How you’re going to get in trouble. How you’ve thrown away your career for domesticity.”

He exhaled, unaffected by his words. “My career was going to die anyways. I’m twenty seven.”

“Twenty seven and still destroying the entire competition.”

“Might as well leave on top,” he replied, shrugging his shoulders.

“You ditched Nationals, the Europeans, the Worlds for this? For him?"

Victor dipped his head, his eyes glaring at the ice. He would have to clear it soon, cleaning the imperfections as if they were never there to begin with.

“You wouldn’t understand,” Victor said simply.

“No, of course I don’t,” he muttered, his green eyes locked onto his dark watch. Victor wondered how often he had looked at that watch, begging for it to turn on. He wondered how many people judged the young blond for not having a soulmate. He wondered how many turned their backs, deeming him unlovable. He sincerely hoped that wasn’t the case.

Victor’s expression immediately softened. "I didn’t mean it like that."

"It doesn’t matter how you meant it,” he responded, his eyes still glaring daggers at his watch.

“Shouldn’t you be happy? You can go on and win Nationals and the Worlds without me to hinder you. You can have that senior debut you want.”

“Not when you’re helping your soulmate.”

“He’s not my soulmate,” Victor argued. He had resigned the fact that Yuuri would ever be his soulmate, at least in the traditional romantic way. Yuuri obviously didn’t feel the same way as him and he needed to respect that.

Yurio snorted. “You can lie to the media all you want, but I can see through it.“

"I’m an open book, what can I say?”

“What I don’t understand is why you’re not married already. Yakov said you’d marry your soulmate within a month.”

Victor cracked a smile. “He’s being ridiculous.”

“Is he?”

Victor sighed. “…I was foolish. I really don’t know anything about love. Maybe that’s why I had it as my theme. I came here expecting to already be in love, but Yuuri’s taught me it requires time. You can’t rush into love, not if you want it to be genuine.”

He had seen it before; rushed love, that is. He had seen Yakov and Lilia’s relationship fall apart before his very eyes. A once loving relationship shattered by a few harsh words. He knew that soulmates weren’t always meant to be, and he supposed that was his destiny with Yuuri. They could grow together, never in a romantic relationship.

Yet, something yearned inside Victor. Something that told him he was truly meant to be with Yuuri. Call it fate or love or soulmates even, but that was how he truly felt;

“So if Yuuri wants some time to focus on his career I need to respect that.”

“What if I win the competition? You’re going to leave and coach me.”

“You won’t,” he stated plainly. He knew from a technical standpoint, Yurio would probably win if they were to compete. Even at the junior level, he could perform sequences that even top skaters couldn’t dream of accomplishing. His technical ability was truly an impressive feat.

“Why? He’s nothing special. Surely, you’ve seen his performance last year. Besides, he doesn’t even have professional skates!”

“I was going to buy him new ones before you interrupted.”

“New skates won’t make him better than me. You’re cheating for him.”

“You wanted a routine from me and I gave you that. The competition is just some petty disdain you have against me.”

“I’ll win. My skating is better,” he claimed confidently, his chest puffed out.

Victor raised an eyebrow, impressed with Yurio’s fervor. It reminded Victor of himself when he was younger: ready to take on whatever the world brought him. And yet, just a few weeks of his life with Yuuri had changed that.

“Is it?” he asked, teasingly. He knew, as much as he hated to admit it, that Yurio was right. Yurio was a rising star in field of skating, accomplishing jumps even Victor had failed to attempt at that age.

“He can’t even land a quad salchow without messing up.”

“He can learn. Technique is teachable.”  Yuuri was a rather lackluster skater when it came to his technical score. He would often stumble during his jumps, his footing not quite landing where they were meant to.

“There’s only so much you can teach.”

Victor rolled his eyes at this comment. He knew both he and Yurio had an innate talent for skating that Yuuri lacked. But he knew Yuuri was determined to change that, and that would be enough.

“He’s receptive and extremely talented,” he responded genuinely. He truly was enamored by Yuuri’s skating. His performances were always breathtaking; his eyes always fixated on his sequences when he skated. Victor couldn’t recall a skater with such mesmerizing sequences, aside from himself of course.

“You’re not here because you think he’s a talented skater.”

“I think he’s a great skater. Better than you even,” Victor remarked with a smirk.

Yurio scowled. “No you don’t. You like him.”

“Focus on winning your competition,” he said, deflecting his comment. He wasn’t about to let Yurio have any satisfaction from this revelation.

“You can’t keep avoiding it.”

“What do you want me to say then?” Victor asked, removing the space between them. From so close, it was easy to see their obvious difference in their height. “Yes, I like him. Yes, he’s my soulmate! Yes, I’ll do anything for him. Are you happy now?”

Yurio looked up, his green eyes meeting Victor’s.

“You really do love him?”

“More than anything,” he replied honestly. He truly did love Yuuri. Maybe not in the traditional sense, but his emotions were something akin to love. And as selfish as it was, he would throw away his career, his life, his everything for a future with Yuuri. He knew it would be agonizing to spend his time with someone who didn’t return his feelings, but he would simply have to resign to that fact. To spend even a moment in his soulmate’s reach was enough for Victor.

“Agape,” he whispered, his voice barely audible.

Victor smiled sadly. “Agape.”

 

_To be continued...?_

>  

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I hope you liked this chapter!   
> I really wanted to show more of Victor's POV about how he is viewing the progression of their relationship! I just love how desperate/innocent is he about love. You'll see why later ;)  
> Also, Yurio is a difficult character for me to write so if you would like to leave me any tips, that would be much appreciated!  
> Just a reminder to check out @adorkable-phangirl on tumblr who was nice enough to edit this chapter! I cannot thank you enough!!  
> If you would like to come talk to me, check out my writing side blog jess-rae-on-ice.tumblr.com!
> 
> Thank you to everyone who has read and left kudos/comments! You all make me so happy!!  
> See you all next time!


	6. Chapter 6

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry for not updating in forever! I got so busy writing other fics and midterm season. But now that it is spring break, I am back and better than ever!  
> I promise that I haven't abandoned this fic!  
> I found this chapter particularly difficult. This chapter is different from most of my previous ones since there is less talking and more thoughts. This was (partially) intentional to show you more of how Yuuri is struggling with the whole soulmate idea. (I guess that's my excuse to writing this chapter which is basically just a projection of my thoughts...)  
> Nevertheless, I hope you enjoy this new chapter!
> 
> Edit: this chapter was beta edited by @amaranthinecastiel and @adorkable-phangirl on tumblr! They're awesome so please follow them!

Of course Victor had to make their small bet into a large scale competition. 

People had flocked from all over the globe, hoping to get a glimpse of the Five Time World Champion. Yuuri couldn't recall a time when there were so many people were at his home rink, not even when he had won his Junior Champion title.

He supposed a fierce competition between a failed figure skater and a new senior competitor was worthy of all the attention. He couldn't really blame Victor for all the pomp - he was used to all of the excessive fame that came with being a famous skater after all - but this was slightly over the top. 

It didn't help that Yuuko's overly enthusiastic children had gotten involved as well. Everything from promotional posters to commemorative key chains were made in preparation. Sure they were tacky - Victor was wearing a fur jacket in some posters for goodness sake - but it got revenue to flow into their failing town. At least this competition brought some good along with it.  

However, the mere thought of having so many people spectate their competition made Yuuri feel sick. Honestly, he was never good in front of crowds. It always seemed that his nerves would get the better of him or that he would get distracted by something in the crowd. Whatever the reason, Yuuri would have preferred if it were a private affair compared to the dramatized event it had become.

"Yuuri, are you ready?" Victor asked, popping his head into the changing room.

"W-what?" Yuuri sputtered in disbelief, unsure that he had heard Victor right. He couldn't believe how quickly time was passing. It seemed like just yesterday Victor had declared that he was his soulmate. Now, he was on the verge of leaving if he couldn't perform his short program up to Victor's high standards. He certainly wasn't ready. 

He knew that a month's time was sufficient enough to have the basics of a short program down, but all the time in the world couldn’t prepare him for this routine. He wasn't sure if would ever truly be prepared. 

He had chosen the theme of love expecting a rather slow piece that he was usually comfortable with skating. Yet with Victor as his coach and his desire to surprise the audience, he had been given a piece about sexual love. 

He had never saw himself as that kind of a performer. Sure, he had seen many skaters perform an erotic piece before, but he never pictured himself doing something so risque. With his relative lack of experience, he knew he would easily fail to perform this routine to its fullest. 

"Didn’t you hear me? You're on soon," Victor clarified.

Yuuri looked up into Victor’s eyes. He hoped he could silently communicate how anxious he was feeling. However, it seemed that Victor didn’t exactly take notice. 

"Yurio just finished and now they're just cleaning off the ice. Aren't you excited?" he asked with his usual cheerful demeanor. 

"Um..." Yuuri said, stumbling over his words. He wasn't sure how to articulate his feelings at the moment. There was the usual nerves from performing but some other sense of dread that pooled in his lower abdomen. 

This would determine if Victor would stay or not. And considering his previous lackluster performances, the chances of him staying were slim to none.

“This will be your debut as my student! This is so exciting! I bet there’s like a thousand people out there right now! You can’t let me down, now!”

“I won’t,” he mumbled, trying to get affected by Victor’s expectations. He knew that everyone was expecting great things from Yuuri, but it all came down to Victor’s thoughts.  It would be up to Victor to decide whether he wanted to stay with Yuuri to begin with. It seemed as though all of Yuuri’s decisions always came back to Victor. Whether to skate, whether to have him as a coach, whether to accept him as a soulmate...

“You look great tonight,” Victor praised, gesturing to Yuuri’s costume. Of course Victor would choose to compliment the very outfit he had worn only ten years prior. The costume was a deep black with transparent mesh running alongside one of the sides. The bottom half was skin tight save for a half-flared skirt. It wasn’t something Yuuri ever dared to wear before - he wondered what his younger self would think knowing he was in Victor’s old lingerie inspired costume - but he supposed it only served to fit with the theme.   

“Thanks,” he muttered, not fully appreciating the compliment. 

"You're nervous," Victor said bluntly. 

Yuuri narrowed his eyes. He knew he shouldn't be crass with Victor since he didn't exactly know that he was a bit anxious when it came to crowds. He debated on whether he should tell Victor to call off the whole spectacle. He should simply tell him that it was a foolish idea for trying to get him to compete against Yurio. Not when everything was stacked against him.

"I'm not good in front of crowds," he settled for instead. He didn’t have the audacity to tell Victor that this piece was making him uncomfortable.  The routine itself was far too different from all of the pieces he had performed before. His usual melancholy and subdued programs were substituted for one built solely on lustful passion. He supposed it could be a mark of a rebirth of his career, one he surely needed after his failure at the finals.

"Then pretend they're not there," he said as if it was the most obvious answer in the world. 

Yuuri almost rolled his eyes at his comment. He had heard the advice before, from coaches much more experienced than Victor. He supposed he couldn't blame him for suggesting something so simple, but it didn't help all the same. Try imagining the audience in their underwear, try breathing through the nose, try pretending that the audience isn’t there. It simply didn't work. Nothing ever seemed to work. Yuuri would still fail miserably and Victor would return to Russia to train with Yurio. 

He supposed an inexperienced coach like Victor wouldn't know that.

“I can’t do that,” he stated plainly. 

“Then close your eyes,” Victor suggested with a smirk.

Yuuri glared at his coach. “That’s not helping.”

"I don’t see why the audience is making you nervous,” Victor said, casually leaning against the wall. “They’re going to love you; I already do. And you're skating for me anyways. I'm your soulmate. No one else matters, right?"

"It doesn’t work like that," he admitted into his hands, ignoring the fact that Victor had once again called him his soulmate. 

"Are you already admitting defeat before you perform?" he asked, his voice low. 

"No. Not really," Yuuri said, almost unsure of himself. He couldn't give up now, not when they had worked so hard. He had refined his program countless times. He had moved all of his jumps to the second half to squeeze some extra points and added two extra combinations. And yet it still wasn't enough. 

Until he could pinpoint was ‘eros’ was to him, he would never master this program. 

Yuuri had begun to think he had made a mistake for choosing love as his theme. He had thought he understood love, or at least the mere concept of love. He was able to watch Disney movies and understand the emotion of love. He knew about the love he had for his own family. Hell, he had even felt some sort of odd love for his childhood friend Yuuko. 

Yet, after meeting Victor, he didn't know what love was anymore. The love he was supposed to feel for Victor was thrust upon him, barely given any time to develop. Like a flower that had bloomed too quickly, it didn’t possibly have any chance in succeeding.  

But his feelings weren’t anything like the love he had known. Love was supposed to be intimate and familiar, but his supposed ‘love’ for Victor were far from that.

His feelings - if he could even call them that at this point - were confusing. He had been in disbelief at first, almost angry that someone had tried to make a joke out of his adoration for the older skater. Now, he silently fought between understanding what his emotions towards Victor were. He wondered if it were just a projection of his idolization or if he had actually begun to develop feelings for his soulmate.  

"Then prove you can win," he whispered into Yuuri's ear. 

Yuuri felt a shiver up his spine. He had never felt this way before.  Love was supposed to be simple: one finds their soulmate and they end up happily ever after. But this wasn’t what had happened and now he was stuck with this confusing wave of emotions.

And that confusing attraction, had been the inspiration for his short program. Victor had said it was to help him boost his confidence, but he was convinced it was just a way for Victor to get a glimpse of his perspective. Victor had obviously felt some sort of sexual attraction in which Yuuri failed to reciprocate. 

He wondered how many people would tell him he was being foolish for basically rejecting his soulmate. Not many people dared to reject their soulmate, let alone reject their celebrity crush. Surely, he was living his childhood dream with the only person he had ever thought about being in a relationship with. 

And yet, it was nothing how he wanted it to be. He wanted to be equals, wanted to fall in love naturally, wanted to rid himself of that stupid timer. But in a world of soulmate timers, that wasn't how it happened. 

He sometimes wondered if he were broken for thinking this way. 

“I can’t-”

“Prove you deserve me.”

He looked into Victor's eyes. He never noticed how beautiful they truly were. They were shade of cerulean blue with small flakes of gold surrounding the pupil. Sure, from posters and television they were stunning in their own way, but seeing them in person only solidified the fact that he wanted to admire them in person. 

"Now tell me you're going to win." 

“I’m going to win,” he muttered halfheartedly. 

Victor frowned, unimpressed with Yuuri’s statement. “Say it like you mean it.”

"I'm going to win," he said with conviction. He knew it would be unlikely for him to win. He didn’t need to see Yurio’s routine to know that he was basically flawless. Even in practice, he was able to execute the routine perfectly from the beginning. He was a bit shaky with his interpretation, but his technical score would surely be enough to make up for it. He could only imagine how beautiful his performance was after a month of hard work. 

Victor smiled, his skin crinkling around his eyes. "Now go out there and make me proud." 

Yuuri stepped on the ice, basking in the comfort the ice provided. It has always been this way, ever since he had taken up ice skating. He had never truly had many friends when he grew up and often looked towards the rink for some sort of solace. He supposed it was a coping mechanism, but it had worked. Albeit, he was slightly lonely but it had hardened him into the skater he was today.

Yuuri shook those thoughts from his mind. He wouldn't let his thoughts affect him now, not when he had so much to lose. 

He skated to the middle, ready to unveil his new short program routine.

_ I can do this,  _ he repeated like a mantra in his head. 

Victor was right, after all. He would be skating for him and him alone. 

He gave a nod to Victor before forming his starting pose. He knew the song by heart by now, knew the story Victor had wrote for him. A story in which two soulmates would passionately meet and instantly fall in love. 

Yuuri knew, as much as he hated to admit it, that it was Victor projecting his feelings. He knew where Victor had gotten the idea, of course. He didn't need to explicitly tell him that he has based it on their own meeting. It was selfish and petty, but he tried not to let Victor's feelings towards him away him at all.  He knew the routine was supposed to be Victor’s after all and he shouldn’t be crass with such an interpretation. 

Besides, Yuuri accepted that it was just an interpretation. Secretly, he had his own interpretation as well. To him, the routine weaved a story of a soulmate so desperate to find his own, just to be rejected. A story in which had one pining over the other, desperate to do whatever the other wanted for the sake of being soulmates. One in which Yuuri had all the power and would use that to his advantage. It was shallow, but he supposed it was the selfish love Eros was about anyways. That would be the true story his routine would be telling tonight. 

Yuuri struck his final pose: his arms crossed around his head and his hip jutting out slightly. He had become so engrossed in his thoughts, he had barely realized that his program was over until he had heard the audience clapping for him. 

Yuuri turned around and addressed the audience, scanning the crowd for familiar faces. He bowed twice, appreciative of all of the affection he was receiving. This only furthered the cries from the audience, praising him on his transformation from a shy skater to one that could rival Victor himself. 

He supposed Victor was right that he would surprise the audience. 

His eyes landed on Victor, as if to ask for his approval. Victor always seemed so mysterious before; he often hid behind what Yuuri had found out was a rather fake smile. Yuuri had all but expected a rather lukewarm response from his coach, but instead found him all but gushing. 

"Yuuri, that was breathtaking," he praised as Yuuri skated towards the boards. 

He opened his arms wide, pulling Yuuri in for a congratulatory hug. Yuuri squirmed a bit, uncomfortable with the sudden affection he was receiving.  

"So, who won?" Yuuri asked pulling away from Victor.  

"Isn't it obvious?" he asked, arching one of his eyebrows. 

Yuuri sucked in a breath of air, watching as Victor gestured towards the crowd.

"It's you," he stated, as if it were obvious. 

"Me?" Yuuri asked, furrowing his eyebrows. 

Sure, he knew his routine was good - he had stayed in the dance studio all night just to make sure - but he wasn't sure it was enough to beat the current Junior World Champion. Yurio was truly a prodigy, much alike to how Victor was when he was a Junior. 

"Yes you," he reaffirmed, ruffling Yuuri’s gelled hair. 

"But I messed up the landings!” 

"That doesn't matter,” Victor claimed, throwing his hands in the air for dramatic effect. “Your performance score was off the charts! I’ve never seen someone perform a routine with so much sex appeal. I wonder what or rather who was on your mind. They're one lucky person." 

"Thanks," he said, blushing. He knew it was high praise coming from the current World Champion, even if it was mostly directed towards himself. “And thank you for making such a wonderful routine for me.”

“Ah, it’s nothing,” Victor scoffed, waving off his comment. “Choreography is nothing without a beautiful muse to perform it.”

"Well I’m glad to here you’ll be staying to choreograph my free program as well. I don't know what I would do if I lost you," Yuuri admitted.  Even after a few short weeks, he had fallen into a routine with him. Every morning he would wake him up with smile to greet him. And every evening, the two would walk home together under the light of the stars. He couldn't imagine Victor leaving. Not now, or not ever.

Victor smirked. "Don't tell me that you've developed feelings for me." 

Yuuri rolled his eyes, but looked down at his covered timer regardless. He knew it was only teasing, but he wondered if it were true. Had he begun to develop feelings for Victor? Just a few months ago, it seemed ridiculous. His own idol being his soulmate?

And yet, the more he had grown to know Victor, he had begun to drift away from idea. Victor was less of some untouchable prodigy and more of an equal in Yuuri’s eyes. He could only hope Victor saw him as an equal as well. 

He wished the circumstances were different. He wished Victor chose him - loved him - for his talent, not because some watch told him to. But he could prove it now. If Victor chose him over Yurio, it would be for his skating and his skating only. At least, that's what he told himself. 

“Yuuri, do you have anything to say to the audience?" one of the reporters asked, breaking him from his thoughts. 

"Um...I'm not really..." Yuuri sputtered, searching for the correct words to say. He was never good with publicity. Secretly, he wished he could skate without all of the fame that came with it. He knew it was irrational and almost selfish - many people, including Victor, loved the spotlight - but Yuuri couldn't care less about the pomp that came with it. He just wanted to skate, fame be damned. 

"Just say something from the heart," Victor encouraged, noticing his slight stumble. 

"Please support me and my coach Victor for our upcoming season," he said in a rehearsed manner. His announcement would surely placate the media for a while, at the very least. He could only hope this confirmation would give both of them a media break until the qualifying rounds. He didn’t know if he could deal with the viscous press in addition to learning a new free program.  

He glanced over at Victor, looking for some form of comfort. Instead, Victor wrapped his arm around his middle. Yuuri relaxed into his embrace, taking in the comfort Victor's presence provided.

"I look forward to showing my love to all of you."

 

_To be continued..._

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you so much for reading!  
> If you are interested, I have other yuri on ice fics including a steven universe crossover that you can read!  
> Please leave your thoughts about this chapter in the comments and a kudos before you leave! It is super appreciated and gives me fuel to write faster!  
> I also want to give a big shout out to @amaranthinecastiel and @adorkable-phangirl for beta reading this chapter!! If you're not already, follow them on tumblr!  
> Thank you all once again and I hope you all have a wonderful day <3!


	7. Chapter 7

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hi all!  
> I am happy to bring you all my second update of this week! Since it was my spring break, I was able to write a lot! However, this fic will probably return to its every other week updates!  
> Also, this chapter has been beta edited by @amaranthinecastiel on tumblr! Please check them out cause they are awesome!  
> Thank you all for your support and please enjoy this chapter! It's an angsty one.
> 
> Warning: mild, internalized homophobia

“Victor, did you get lost?” Yuuri asked, noticing Victor slowing down on his bike.

The two had went on their usual daily morning run around the town, but Victor had other plans than to end at the ice rink. Instead, Victor had stopped in front of one of the small beaches in town. Despite being a known as a tourist town, Hasetsu’s beaches were anything but an attraction. The sand wasn’t smooth or white as picturesque beaches typically were and was littered with small pebbles. The ocean was dark, lapping over the rocky shore. There was a small shower towards the edge that dripped slightly. It wasn’t well maintained like many of the beaches Victor usually chose to spend his vacations at, but it had its own personal charm.

“This isn’t the ice rink,” Yuuri clarified, wheezing slightly. 

“I know. I just wanted to see the beach,” Victor declared, dismounting from his bicycle. He knew it wasn’t the best day for the beach - the morning sun was hidden by a layer of thick clouds - but it was decent enough for a quick stop. He was thankful that it wasn’t raining, at least. 

Besides, the poor weather deterred anyone else from following and disturbing them. No media, no annoying fans; just the two of them. It was almost refreshing without other people around. After his announcement as Yuuri’s full-time coach for the season, he had been overwhelmed by the media attention he had received. Victor found he barely had free time that wasn’t occupied answering questions from the media or fans. And that didn’t even take into consideration all of the comments on his Instagram and Twitter pages. He had to shut off his phone on numerous occasions just to ignore the constant stream of questions. It seemed that even after his public announcement people were still begging for his opinion on everything, from his his career to his future to his relationship with Yuuri. 

Six months ago, he would’ve been grateful for the attention. Many skaters yearn to get even a sliver of the attention he was receiving. But now, it only reminded him how empty his life was. He wanted nothing more than to escape it all. Escape the harassment, the pressure, the expectations. 

Yuuri furrowed his eyebrows at Victor’s rather spontaneous decision to skip morning practice for a day at the beach. “What, why?" 

"You’ve been practicing too hard.”

Yuuri rolled his eyes at Victor’s comment. "That’s funny coming from my coach." 

Victor shrugged. He supposed that he wasn’t a good coach, after all. 

"Well we all need rest days,” he claimed. And it was true. Rest days were necessary for the health of competitive skaters. Even stubborn Yakov had given him a few days off a month to recipe rate after a hard training regiment. He supposed now would be a good chance to take a well deserved break and a beach seemed to be the perfect destination. Victor had always found beaches to be extremely relaxing. He didn’t have much of a beach back in Russia, but the soft cries of the gulls reminded him a bit of home.

Besides, there was nothing more romantic than a date at the beach.

“Very well,” Yuuri agreed with a huff. He nervously looked out at the water, his eyes trailing a small boat in the distance. “But only for a bit." 

Victor nodded in agreement. He knew they couldn’t afford take too much time out of their training, not since they had lost so much time already. The Grand Prix was only a few short months away, not to mention the smaller regional competitions that were even closer.  

Victor dragged his bike in the sand, tying it around one of the lamp posts. He walked a few steps towards the water before plopping down in the sand. He motioned for Yuuri to join him.

Yuuri reluctantly agreed, hesitantly sitting down next to him. He could tell he was frustrated by his coach’s decision but was trying to make the most of the situation. 

"Are you cold?” Victor asked, noticing how Yuuri was shaking slightly. He couldn’t really blame him for being cold, seeing as he hadn’t prepared for such an excursion. Yuuri was donned in only his usual light jacket he used for his morning run and had left the rest of his clothing at the ice rink. He knew it was practical for exercising, but hardly the right attire for a morning trip to the beach in June.

“Not really,” Yuuri replied all too quickly. 

Victor frowned at the comment. Yuuri was always one to deny his help, no matter how much he needed it. Well, he supposed, two could play that game. 

“You’re shivering,” he noted. 

“I’m not-”

“Here, take my coat,” he insisted, shrugging off his jacket. 

"I don’t-" 

Before Yuuri could protest further, Victor wrapped his jacket around him. There was really no point in having him freeze to death. 

Yuuri snuggled into the oversized coat. "Thanks." 

"Are you feeling okay? You have been yourself lately. You’ve been distant, at least more than usual." 

"Sorry there’s…a lot on my mind,” he muttered, looking down at his soulmate watch. 

Victor frowned. “Is there something wrong with your watch?" He had suspected that this was a possibility. Yuuri continued to keep his watch covered, despite that it went off. He knew it was only covered because he was practically famous and they were in public, but Victor couldn't help but feel upset.

He knew it was petty but he grew to resent that small cover. Victor knew it was tradition in Japan to keep it covered until it went off, but after that it was supposed to be worn with pride. Instead, Yuuri kept it covered and even insisted that Victor covered his as well. He knew it was mostly to stop prying eyes but he wondered if there were an ulterior motive. 

"No,” he responded all too quickly. He exhaled before clarifying, “just thinking about things." 

"I’ve been thinking about things too,” Victor admitted with a sigh. 

It was true, he had been thinking about things. He had been thinking about their relationship. He thought he had made some sort of progress, but now he wasn’t so sure. Yuuri had once again closed himself off. At first, he thought it was because of his gender or some physical attribute, but Yuuri didn’t seem like the type of care about something so trivial. Then he thought it had to do with Victor being a fellow competitor, but again it didn’t seem like a likely conclusion. His last thought was that Yuuri had a secret lover, but his friends and family confirmed that he wasn’t in any romantic relationships. Now, Victor was all out of ideas. He was beginning to think that Yuuri didn’t want a soulmate at all. 

“Why don’t you believe in soulmates?” Victor blurted. He inwardly cursed himself, a bit upset that he had pried for such information. Honestly, he was a bit frustrated. He thought he had gotten through to Yuuri when he had declared he wanted his theme to be love - even agreed to have his routine be about sexual love - but it seemed his progress only further pushed Yuuri away. It seemed as if every attempt he made led to nothing and, frankly, it was becoming downright frustrating. 

Yuuri tensed, his whole body going rigid. 

“I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to say that,” Victor apologized a bit ashamed with himself. He didn’t mean to say that aloud, but somehow the words fell from his lips.

“Well I could ask you why you do believe,” Yuuri countered coldly. Victor inwardly flinched. He knew he shouldn’t have said something so foolish, but he needed to know. For the sake of their relationship, at the very least. 

“Touché,” Victor said, trying not be offended by his remark. He knew he shouldn’t take Yuuri’s comment personally. He picked up a pebble, running his hand over its smooth surface. He flipped it over once before tossing it out to the water. The rock made a small splash, creating a small ring of ripples which quickly dissipated into sea foam. 

“But you didn’t answer my question.”

“I guess I just never saw myself as having one." 

"Why not?” He knew it was rude to ask, but his curiosity had gotten the better of him. He surely wasn’t going to stop now, not when they had made so much progress. 

“I’m not sure,” he said, his eyes still fixated on the dark water. 

“Did you ever see a soulmate match fail?” Victor asked, raising an eyebrow. From personal experience, he knew how hard it was to see soulmates fail. Especially at a young age, it could damage one’s opinion about soulmates for the rest of their lives. He knew it was rare to see two soulmates not end up together but it wasn’t impossible. He could only hope Yuuri didn’t have to go through the same experience. 

Yuuri glared at Victor, his dark eyes narrowing slightly. “Are you expecting some reason?" 

"I don’t know. Maybe….” he reasoned. He supposed there had to be a logical explanation for why Yuuri hated soulmates. Victor concluded that he must have seen a soulmate failure or he knew two people that were together that weren’t soulmates. Whatever the case, he knew there must be some reason that Yuuri detested the idea of soulmates so much. And Victor was determined to find out why. 

“I’ve never seen someone so sad to meet their soulmate,” Victor continued. His eyes watched the clouds roll across the sky, gently passing over the water. There were no signs that the clouds would clear anytime soon, but he hoped the rain would subside until they were back inside and practicing. “I just assumed there must be a reason why." 

"I don’t have a reason." 

Victor sighed, letting out a long breath of cool air. He knew it sounded petty, but he had hoped Yuuri at least had some reason why he hated soulmates. A secret lover or a dark past. Anything really. If there was a reason, at least he could try to find a way to help. 

"Why is this so important?” Yuuri asked, coldly. “Do you have a reason why you’re obsessed with soulmates?" 

Victor blinked twice. Nobody had ever asked him such question and so he never thought about it. Liking soulmates was supposed to be the default, not the other way around. He had believed everyone wanted a soulmate, no explanation required. Now, he wasn’t too sure. 

”…I supposed I just projected a bit of my feelings onto you,“ he confessed and brushed a piece of hair behind his ear. 

Yuuri snorted. "You can say that again." 

Victor exhaled. He didn’t know how to tell Yuuri how he devoted everything in his life to skating. How he had moved in with his coaches. How he had cut his hair and changed his appearance for the sake of reinventing himself. How he had shackled himself to the one thing that used to bring him comfort. And now, his gold medals were only a reminder of the love he had neglected. 

Truthfully, he hadn’t told anyone about his past, save for his coach. He didn’t know how to say that his own family shunned him for his own sexuality. That the people who took him in were in the midst of getting a separation because of him. That his soulmates was the only source of love in his life and he had been denied of that as well. 

He thought when his clock counted down and he had a soulmate, the love he had neglected would magically return. He knew it was immature and childish, but he wished his love could be that simple. 

"I looked to my soulmate as my only source of love in my life,” he settled on instead.  He carded his hands through his platinum blond hair, getting bits of sand and debris in tangled in. Usually, he would rush to the water and try to rinse his hair but the small pieces of sand didn’t seem to affect him at all. “When you rejected me, I assumed I’m incapable of being loved." 

"Victor.” A strong gust of air swept Yuuri’s hair, sweeping strands of black hair in front of his eyes. "That’s not it." 

"I know,” Victor said, although he was unsure if he meant it. He cupped a mound of sand into his hands, enjoying how the smooth grains felt between his fingers. 

“I like you, I really do. It’s just that I never thought anyone would like me.”

"That’s not true. Plenty of people like you! Your family. Your friends. Your fans? Me?" 

Yuuri hugged his knees to his chest. "That doesn’t count. You have to like me." 

"I don’t have to do anything,” Victor protested. Inwardly, he hated that Yuuri thought of him that way. He didn’t know how to convince Yuuri that he wasn’t staying because he felt obligated in any way; he truly wanted nothing more than to spend the rest of his life with Yuuri. Was that so hard to comprehend?

Victor inhaled through his nose, taking in the sweet smell of the sea breeze. There was something calming about the smell of the water. 

"I could leave,” Victor continued. “I could return to skating. But I don’t want to. I don’t want to leave you alone again.“ 

Yuuri shrugged his shoulders. "I had always fought in this world alone. Wouldn’t be much different." 

"You don’t need to be alone. You don’t have to push everyone away." 

"If I’m alone, I’m safe,” Yuuri muttered into his knees. 

“Is that really how you want to live?” Victor asked. He placed a hand on Yuuri’s knee in an attempt to comfort his partner. 

“Maybe,” he said softly, hoping Victor wouldn’t catch his quiet words. 

“Yuuri…I’ll always be here,” he promised. After the short time they had spent together, he didn’t think he was capable of leaving Yuuri. Yuuri was perfect and everything he wanted and more. He continued to surprise him with every passing day. He wanted to learn everything there was to know about Yuuri, even if it took a lifetime together. 

“I know. You’ve always been with me. Ever since I was young, I’ve looked up to you. You with your stunning routines and charming attitude. I had always thought you were beautiful." 

"Even with my long hair?” Victor asked in an attempt to lighten the mood. He knew his long hair was something that divided his fans. Some of his fans had been upset that he had gotten rid of his signature hair. Others had praised him for finally cutting it. Whatever the case, he was delighted to hear that Yuuri had loved him no matter what he looked like. Besides, it was only Yuuri’s opinion that mattered now.

“Especially with your long hair,” Yuuri admitted with a blush. “I was always sad when you cut it. I almost cried in my room when I saw your promotional material with short hair that season." 

"So that’s what you had hanging in your room?” Victor asked with a smirk. “Promotional material?" 

Yuuri flushed, the tips of his ears turning a deep shade of red at the mere mention of his rather extensive collection of Victor Nikiforov material. There were pictures Victor didn’t even remember taking pinned up to the wall. "You found that?" 

"I’m not as oblivious as everyone thinks.” Although Victor maintained that he knew all along, it was all pure accident that he had seen the posters before Yuuri had ripped them down. He had been looking desperately for Makkachin on his second night, almost worried that someone had stolen his prized pet. He had checked the entire grounds, and even got Yuuri’s family involved in the affair. In the end, he had found Makkachin curled up on Yuuri’s bed, surrounded by posters of himself.  

Yuuri groaned and covered his face with his hands. 

“I know you idolize me,” Victor said, trying to defuse the situation. He knew how embarrassing it must be for Yuuri. Admittedly, he was a bit embarrassed seeing the posters himself. Nevertheless, he found it endearing that Yuuri had looked up to him for so long. 

“I can seen it in your skating as well,” he continued. “Which is why I’m so curious to why you don’t want me to be your soulmate." 

"I guess I’m scared,” Yuuri said, drawing circles in the sand with his index finger. Bits of sand clung to the inside of his nails but he didn’t seem to mind. “I don’t want you to be embarrassed of me. I know I can’t live up to you or your expectations. And I don’t want to keep idolizing you either. I want to see you as an equal, not like a god. I want to know that our relationship wasn’t built on us projecting our feelings but on loving who you are." 

Victor paused, taking in the ambiance of the morning. He enjoyed the soft sounds of the ocean, breaking against the rocky shore. 

"Wow, I never thought about it that way,” Victor admitted. He leaned back in the land, lying flat on his back. He stared up at sky, finding streaks of sunlight in the distance. Victor wondered if the clouds would clear before they left the beach. 

“It’s true, though. The Victor I obsessed over as a child isn’t the Victor that’s my soulmate." 

"Your soulmate?” Victor repeated, as if he hadn’t heard him correctly. He immediately shot up from his relaxing position and sat upright. The mere mention of them as soulmates made Victor’s heart flutter. He had never heard Yuuri refer to them as soulmates, at least not in a positive tone. It sounded almost foreign to hear such words from him.  

“I thought you didn’t believe in soulmates." 

"I don’t,” he stated plainly. 

Victor exhaled. He had thought they had made some progress in their relationship. Having Yuuri even acknowledge him as his soulmate was simply too good to be true and no length of time at the beach talking out their problems was ever going to change that. It was frustrating to say the least, to try so hard only to be rejected time and time again. He knew it was selfish, but he wanted nothing more than to be Yuuri’s soulmate, no matter how many times he had to convince him. 

“I don’t think I ever will,” he continued. “I don’t think I believe that I can be that perfect person you were hoping for." 

Victor sighed. He couldn’t see how Yuuri could even think that he didn’t meet his expectations. Yuuri was patient and exceptional and downright perfect. Victor swore he could kill a person and would still be perfect in his eyes. What was the phrase again? For better or for worse? Until death dto us part.

"What do you want me to be to you? Your coach? Your friend? Your lover?”

Yuuri waved his hands, embarrassed by the rather suggestive propositions. "I want you to be who you are. Not my coach, not my idol, not my soulmate. Just Victor." 

Victor paused. He had never been told to be himself before. He had always been crafted by his parents or his coach or his manager to fit some sort of persona. At first, an innocent skater, then an eligible bachelor, and now a retired world champion. To simply be himself was something he had never done.

"You know, nobody has ever told me that. “Everyone sees me as what they want me to be and it gets tiring. But you, you see me as who I am." He smiled softly, placing a finger to his lips. "And that’s the Yuuri I love." 

"I think I might have feelings for you you too,” Yuuri said softly. “But I want you to know it’s not because some watch told me we’re destined to be together." 

"Yuuri,” he said, looking into his eyes. His eyes were inviting, a warm shade of brown with flecks of gold. He never wanted to look away from such a beautiful sight. “I have never loved anyone more than you. And I’m not saying that because a watch told me. Sure, that’s what brought us together, but it can’t tell me how to feel. I love you and I’m saying this knowing the person you are." 

"Victor…” he said breathlessly. 

“If you would, can you give me a chance? As your soulmate-no, no, as your lover.” Victor held out his hand for Yuuri to take. This would be the last test. If Yuuri rejected him now, he knew he would have to move on and leave his soulmate behind him. 

“Yeah, I’d like that,” Yuuri agreed, lacing his fingers into Victor’s. 

Victor melted into his touch. Yuuri’s hands were warm and slightly sweaty, but Victor paid no mind to that. Victor liked the way their hands seemed to fit perfectly together, as if they were made to be together.

“I’d like that a lot.”

 

_ To be continued... _

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I hope you all like this!  
> And yes, after all this time, they are finally (officially) together. I hope it wasn't too rushed. But still, they are only in the beginning stages of their relationship and will not progress as fast as it did in the show. I always intended for this to happen, even if it's not how they thought it would happen.  
> Truly, it was really interesting writing from Victor's perspective. I wanted to show how hard it is for him to understand but that he's willing to take the time and learn. If you have any ways to help me write this better, feel free to tell me!  
> Also, I had to give him a tragic backstory. But don't worry, it'll be important later! Plus, I wanted to show more about Lilia and Yakov who I personally want to get back together for season 2! Just saying...  
> I want to give a huge shout out to @amaranthinecastiel on tumblr for editing this chapter! Please support them because they are awesome!
> 
> If you liked this chapter, please leave comments/kudos! They really inspire me to write more! Also, if you like this story, please check out my other fics! Thank you all for your support and I'll see you in about two weeks!

**Author's Note:**

> Hi all! I hope you enjoyed this chapter!  
> Feel free to leave kudos and comments! They are really appreciated!
> 
> Please follow me on my tumblr @jesse-rae-on-ice for more updates!!


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